Do you think you may be in a friendship that only goes one way? Beware these five signs of a one-sided friendship!
Beware These 5 Signs Of A One-Sided Friendship
Everything Is About Them
The person makes everything about them. They will only discuss their interests, hobbies, wants, and needs. The person makes no effort to listen to the other person.
When you decide to get together with that person, they often choose where to go and what to do. You may not have a choice in the matter.
In contrast, a sign of a good friend is they have empathy. They want to talk to you. They want to listen to you. They ask you questions. It is a two-sided friendship, not a one-sided friendship.
They Never Open Up
Some people just have more of a difficult time opening up. It could be because they are introverted, they may be autistic, or it may be for any number of reasons. They may have difficulty expressing emotions or not want to tell them. It could also be that they do not know how to express feelings to others besides a strong emotion such as anger.
They are not interested in giving details about what is going on in their personal life. The individual’s inability to open up may have nothing to do with their feelings about your friendship.
In your personal interactions, the person will feel off or empty. It can make it challenging to connect with the person since you cannot clearly understand who they are and where they are coming from since they do not open up.
You Know You Cannot Count On Them
You can never count on them. For anything. They cancel on you. They may tell you that they forgot. The person may be annoyed or angry at you. They have no problem telling people confidential information or stories you do not want to be told.
A good friend makes a point of getting together to talk and catch up. They will arrive on time or inform you if they are behind schedule.
They Do What Is Convenient
They are never the ones to initiate getting together. You are the one who always texts or calls them to do something. The only time they may contact someone is if they need something. They are always asking for or expecting favors or something in return. To them, the friendship is transactional. The worst-case scenario is that this friend is using you.
A good friend does not manipulate you to their ends. They genuinely want to spend time together. It may be going out for coffee, drinks, or the park.
Behavior Follows A Pattern
Some people may need more assistance from other people for mental health or personal reasons. They could be dealing with depression, be on the autism spectrum, or have a hard time getting along with people.
It is not a friendship if you find yourself doing all the work in the friendship and they never reciprocate. It is assistance. They may not be invested or interested in the friendship.
What Is Friendship?
According to the Stanford Encyclopedia of Philosophy, “Friendship… is a distinctively personal relationship that is grounded in a concern on the part of each friend for the welfare of the other, for the other’s sake, and that involves some degree of intimacy.” It simply means that you care about each other to some degree.
There are different levels of friendship, from an acquaintance to a lover to a spouse. The deeper and more intimate the friendship is, the more serious it will be. Many people may mistake an acquaintance for a friendship. In the social media age, many “friends” are really not your friends. They are merely connections on the Internet with random people.
Contrary to popular belief, ending a bad friendship is a sign of maturity for an individual. There is nothing wrong with blocking toxic and negative people out of one’s life. It is beneficial.
Secure Single recommends:
-
The Problem With New Year’s Resolutions
-
How Being Single Can Save You Money
-
An Introduction To Online Safety For Single Women
Summary
The signs of a one-signed friendship may indicate that the person is toxic. It is best to avoid negative people. You could end the friendship with this person if it has always been one-sided.
Views expressed in this article are the author’s opinions and do not necessarily reflect the views of Secure Single. It is intended for informational and educational purposes only. It is not investment or financial advice. James Bollen is the author of Thriving Solo: How to Flourish and Live Your Perfect Life (Without A Soulmate). Now available in paperback and for the Kindle on Amazon. Subscribe to Secure Single’s Substack for free!
Are you wondering if you should end a friendship? Are you worried about having a conversation with your friend? Are you unsure of how to end a friendship? Here are five strategies to end a friendship.
Why Do People End Friendships?
People may end friendships for many reasons. People may not see a friend frequently enough, so they lose touch. You may experience a falling out.
You may no longer be interested in the same types of things as you want. You may have matured while your friend has not. There may be disagreements that the two of you could never work out that continue to arise in the friendship.
No matter the stories or experiences that you may have, you can decide which of these five strategies to end a friendship works best for you.
5 Strategies To End A Friendship
Social Media
You can talk to your friend over the social media on which your friend is most active. Social media is the most impersonal of the five. You want to describe to them why you want to end the friendship.
After you get them to understand your position on ending the friendship, you will want to block them across all your social media.
Text message
You can send your friend a text message. If your friend texts often, this may be the best way to contact them.
You can make your point. Answer any questions. You can then block your friends from social media and phone contacts.
Phone call
You can call your friend over the phone. You can know what you plan to talk to them over the phone.
You can prepare a script for the call that you can use. Telemarketers use scripts. You can apply this strategy to end a friendship.
Video Call
You can have a video call over Skype, Zoom, or on your phone or social media that allows for video calls.
A video call is a compromise between communicating via messaging and in person.
In-Person
You can have the conversation in person. An in-person conversation is the most direct way to end a friendship. You will have less control than being on a phone or social media. The exchange happens in real time.
The main benefit of ending a friendship in person is that you can read your friend’s nonverbal body language. Nonverbal communication plays a critical role in human communication. Understanding what your friend is saying non-verbally can help you better understand what they may think about you wanting to end the friendship.
Solutions
You want to utilize the medium that your friend is most active on. You want to have your reasons ready for why you want to end the friendship. You want to prepare for any pushback. You do not want to be afraid to stand up for yourself. If you have concluded that it is best to end a friendship, then unapologetically do it.
I have lost touch with my college friends. I blocked two of my former closest friends across my social media and on my phone. They were negatively influencing me. One would only talk about drinking and entertainment.
My other former friend was manipulative and used me to advance himself. He did that while saying that he was helping me.
Please be sure to be clear on your why. Stand up for yourself. Tell your former friend “No”. Walk away and start to live your best life.
Secure Single recommends:
-
Singles Do Not Need An Artificially Intelligent Boyfriend Or Girlfriend
-
A Return To Self-Responsibility
-
Introduction For Singles On The Different Types Of Savings Accounts
Conclusion
You will experience that friendships naturally end over time. You want to determine the reason why you have decided to want to end a friendship. It is up to you to determine how much you tell your friend. You could block them today across your social media and devices or choose to get together at a location of your choosing to end the friendship.
You will feel better about yourself once you end a friendship that does not benefit you. I know ending those two friendships immensely helped me. You can take the next step by choosing one of these five strategies to end a friendship today.
Views expressed in this article are opinions of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of Secure Single. James Bollen is the author of Thriving Solo: How to Flourish and Live Your Perfect Life (Without A Soulmate). Now available in paperback on Amazon. Subscribe to Secure Single’s Substack for free!
In order to be a Secure Single, we all need to be aware of ‘Cuffing Season’. What is this, you may ask? It is the seasonal time of the year when single people link up and get into relationships during the colder winter months. This is an important to know, because you may be able to observe this behavior in the people around you. There is science behind why people get into relationships is even more interesting. Singles need to know what cuffing season is in order that you can prevent yourself from getting into a distracting relationship because it is the thing to do during the season.
6 Simple Explanations Of What Cuffing Season Is
Who
Men and women who link up. You may notice that a lot of your friends have started dating significant others during the cold winter months. Be on the watch for Facebook relationship status updates, and observe that your Tinder inbox messages are slightly slowing.
What
Relationships. Everywhere. Don’t be fooled by this crazy natural occurrence. People may be getting into relationships for the wrong reason, and it may just be temporary. If someone approaches you, slap them in the face – just kidding. But just aware that this ‘cuffing season’ is why people men or women may be approaching you. You may also want to look into bear pepper spray, just in case, someone tries to ‘cuff’ you.
When
During the colder winter months. Be aware. You are probably safe in the spring, summer, and even fall, but come winter, you’ve got to be on your guard. We aren’t called Secure Singles for anything, we stay secure as a whole person without the neediness of another. Who needs all that lovey-dovey junk anyways? Well, sometimes I do indulge in The Notebook, by myself…..
Where
Anywhere. Be on your guard for people approaching you in an attempt to ‘cuff’ you. Say no. You’ve worked too hard for the freedom you have as a single person and are working on getting your career off the ground or healing emotional wounds from the last terrible relationship. No means no!
Why
The science behind it all has to do with our hormones. A funny little hormone called Oxytocin is the ‘love-bonding’ or ‘cuddling’ hormone. In the winter months, your hormones levels are different, causing you to want to be close to another, perhaps for survival reasons. The cuffing season is a natural biological movement. What can you do? Resist cuffing like the plague!
How
Use your reason and logic over human emotion. Yes, our feelings are important, but when it comes to hormones and lovers, know that it’s a TRAP! Keep yourself sane, and stay out of crazy relationships. Try wearing garlic, as it might ward off the romancers. Stay single, stay happy, and most importantly stay sane. You got this.
Summary
We say ‘ugh!’ to cuffing season. Romance is just a black hole filled with terror and doom. Like the famous economist, John Maynard Keynes once said, “In the long run, we are all dead“, so if this is the case for us, saving yourself from being in a bad relationship is worth it to have enough time to enjoy your life. Stick with what you know and stay true to your colors. Being single is the ultimate expression of independence. So now, during the cold winter months of ‘cuffing season’, be brave and stay securely single.
Cheers,
Danielle
Views expressed in this article are the author’s opinions and do not necessarily reflect the views of Secure Single. It is intended for informational and educational purposes only. It is not investment or financial advice. James Bollen is the author of Thriving Solo: How to Flourish and Live Your Perfect Life (Without A Soulmate). Now available in paperback and for the Kindle on Amazon. Subscribe to Secure Single’s Substack for free!
In a world that emphasizes couples and married people have forgotten about the other types of love. The emphasis on romance and erotic love in the search for The One has influenced people to focus on eros when it comes to relationships. Other types of love are lost at the expense of erotic love. The continual search for the mythical One comes at the expense of your friends. Friendships are treated as less important are devalued at the expense to find erotic love. Singles should focus on having a couple of close friends and developing phileo love instead of neglecting their friends in the never-ending search for erotic love.
Why Singles Need To Focus On Phileo Love
It is important for singles to have friends. It is vital to have one or two close friends who you can call a best friend. It can be difficult to find good quality friends, but that should not stop you. In fact, a good friend may be harder to find than finding someone to marry. For that reason, singles should take friendships seriously and should not take their friends for granted.
Singles should cultivate friendships with a few people to sow seeds of friendship with people that they connect with well. Reap the handful of friendships that seem to be going towards being more than causal acquaintances and develop your relationships with those few people. Nurture the friendship with those few people to determine what common interests, values, and goals that you both share and see how committed they are to follow up with things that they say that they will do. Realistically, these few friends will become your good friends while the one or two who you hang out with and connect the best with will become your close friends or best friends.
After you have determined your close friends from your best friends, you can better focus on developing relationships with the one or two people with who you best connect and who share your values. Those one or two people will really be your best friends. Personally, I only have one person who gets the best friend status and a couple of people who get the ranking of close friends in my social circle. Given human nature, time, and the complexity of relationships it will likely be the case for you as well. Focus your most time and energy on your relationship with your best friend and secondarily focus on your relationships with your close friends. Those two groups will be the most important for you to maintain a community and to being able to go out to places that you both enjoy wherever you may live. My close friends, and best friend, share the same interests in trying new restaurants and cocktail lounges for example. Your interests may be different, but most likely the friends with who you are closer share your same interests.
Concentrate on your relationships with your close friends and best friends, your less important friendships will naturally begin to take less of your time. This is healthy and natural. Those friends you spend less time with and most likely don’t share common interests or values. You may still see them from time to time, but they are acquaintances as opposed to good close friends. Those relationships, while important, are less valuable to you in the long term compared to those who you would call your close or best friends. Life happens. It is natural for friends to drift away and for friendships to end. If you have one or two best friends and small number of good friends. You should count yourself lucky in life. Focus on nurturing and developing your relationships with your close and best friends instead of pursuing romance and dating relationships.
Summary
Society places dating and marriage relationships on a pedestal in the name of erotic love, it is important for singles to remember the other types of love that are just as important. Singles should build on and mature their relationships with their close and best friends. Friendships lead to a fuller and healthy life. Friendships also benefit singles in building social skills. Singles should put their energy towards fostering phileo love instead of erotic love.
Views expressed in this article are the author’s opinions and do not necessarily reflect the views of Secure Single. It is intended for informational and educational purposes only. It is not investment or financial advice. James Bollen is the author of Thriving Solo: How to Flourish and Live Your Perfect Life (Without A Soulmate). Now available in paperback and for the Kindle on Amazon. Subscribe to Secure Single’s Substack for free!
Since the holiday season is basically over (until Valentine’s Day), we will finally stop seeing those annoying engagement pictures on Facebook about your old high-school friends getting engaged. I admit, I love being single, and the reason I choose to be single is that there are a lot of men my age that need some time to mature. I’m overhearing pickup lines from intoxicated men at the bar and being called to come over at 10 pm. Where are all the good guys? I have a bit of relationship envy and maybe readers can relate. How is everyone else happy and in love, when all I seem to get are those unwanted nude pics from guys I have no interest in? Here’s how to deal with relationship envy, and don’t worry you are not alone.
Three Ways Singles Can Deal With Relationship Envy
Stand In Your Truth
Perhaps we all need to fix ourselves to be presentable to another person. We might need to work on how much we value ourselves and where we derive our self-worth. Maybe self-confidence is low. Whatever caused the reason for those low feelings, there is always a way to improve. Stand in your truth and recognize where you are in life. If you need to find a support group, find one. Do whatever you need to do in order to recognize who you are, where you stand, and where you need to get in order to improve your life. You owe it to yourself to pick yourself up and make a better life for yourself. Along the way of finding yourself, you might just find you attract better partners. Seriously, no more 10 pm calls, what’s wrong with our society that people do this?
Stop Comparing Yourself To Others
This is perhaps one of the most beaten drums in all complicated conversations when we talk about why we aren’t keeping up with the Joneses or the Kardashians as much as we’d like. Comparison is a sick habit we should all avoid. It destroys our self-confidence and makes us feel inadequate. There will always be someone who is smarter, richer, more beautiful, or more whatever than we are. What we can do, instead of comparing how happy our best friend is in their new relationship, is to recognize that we are awesome and amazing just the way we are. Of course, there is room for improvement, but do it at your pace and make the changes out of love. No matter how inadequate you feel, love yourself through it all. Make sure you write down the pro’s about yourself, and to not compare yourself to others who seem to have it all, the car, the house, the relationship, the dogs, and the new baby. You are where you are, and you can love yourself just the way you are. Improve your life out of love to become better, and never compare.
Realize That You May Not Be Ready For A Relationship
Yeah, this is a hard pill to swallow. I can relate when I feel like I can take on more work but then get slapped in the face because I have not yet developed the skills to operate at that level. There are no cutting corners, and the same goes for relationships. You just may not be ready. Remember that everyone matures at different stages in their lives, and may just be going through some trauma. Heal yourself, love yourself, and recognize that you may need more time cooking in the oven before you are ready to pop out and be a beautifully decorated cake. Take time to appreciate where you are.
You may just realize that marriage and relationships just suck and want to join a polyamorous community. Or you may toss in the towel altogether and say fuck it. However you decide to handle your relationship envy, just enjoy being single and love yourself through all of it. Take your time to develop your career and stop focusing on what’s going on outside of you. Focus on you, and do what you need to in order to move on, move up, and become more badass than you already are. Make it happen. Your happiness is 100% depended on you, so do what makes you happy. Love you all! Stay securely single!
Views expressed in this article are the author’s opinions and do not necessarily reflect the views of Secure Single. It is intended for informational and educational purposes only. It is not investment or financial advice. James Bollen is the author of Thriving Solo: How to Flourish and Live Your Perfect Life (Without A Soulmate). Now available in paperback and for the Kindle on Amazon. Subscribe to Secure Single’s Substack for free!
Ann Coulter sent out a Tweet the other day that succumbed to society’s stereotypes of singles being sad and lonely and couples being happy. Being single does not mean that you are unhappy and lonely. That is a myth created by society. The single shaming done by society, the media, and politics needs to stop since singles are now the majority of the American population.
Ann Coulter And The Culture Of Single Shaming
As someone with influence in society, especially in certain political circles, Ann Coulter is hurting singles. She should be helping them instead of saying that singles live “lives of quiet desperation and will die alone”. Further, as a professional single woman, Ann Coulter fails to realize the values of the single life and that singles are healthier than couples. Women are more independent than ever today. Women do not need a man to be happy. It is disheartening to see a single political celebrity take part in single shaming because Ann Coulter is not only shaming singles, but is also shaming herself.
Politics Of Being Anti-Single
The politics of both American political parties have always favored those who are married and have a family. This is because because they are an essential political base. Both the Democrat and Republican Parties have historically been anti-single. Politicians need to attract this base to to win an election. Politics has used taxes to assist those who are married and who have families since it is thought that families are a requirement for a healthy society. This belief has resulted in couples with children receiving tax deductions for children. Children become a tax write off for couples while singles pay a tax penalty.
These can include tax cuts and deductions for being married and having children. There are already more than 1,000 laws, just on the federal level, that help provide benefits to those who are married. Those laws were written and enacted by both American political parties. Washington and Politicians like to ignore singles because it is good for them to be seen as pro-marriage and pro-family. Why do you think politicians are always kissing babies on the campaign trail? To win votes and to look relatable to their voters. This has to change.
Direction Politics Should Take Towards Singles
Political institutions from the local level to the federal level in Washington need to realize that singles are now the majority of the American population. Those who are married are becoming a smaller number of the American population. Future policies that should work to dismantle tax deductions that those who are married receive for having children. Singles should not be taxed more people who are married. The more than 1,000 laws that favor those who are married should be rewritten or amended to make a truly equal playing field for everyone when it comes to taxes. It will not matter if they are single, cohabiting, or married. Everyone will be taxed the same instead of some receiving tax benefits from the government for having children.
Views expressed in this article are the author’s opinions and do not necessarily reflect the views of Secure Single. It is intended for informational and educational purposes only. It is not investment or financial advice. James Bollen is the author of Thriving Solo: How to Flourish and Live Your Perfect Life (Without A Soulmate). Now available in paperback and for the Kindle on Amazon. Subscribe to Secure Single’s Substack for free!
I don’t really know what’s wrong with the world, and how we got here, but I do know we can fix ourselves to be a better life position in financial health, physical health, and emotional health. Many of us experience traumas devastating heartaches that make it difficult us to love others, and that is when we are labeled ‘emotionally unavailable’. We want to work on ourselves and know that it is okay to be emotionally available, for now. To work past traumas and become more whole and complete people, we need to work on ourselves, to heal the past so we can be fully present to create the future that we make into a glorious and abundant life. We are worth it, and we can begin today to heal ourselves from emotionally unavailable to a whole and complete person today. Follow these three steps if you are single by circumstance and emotionally unavailable.
Take Inventory Of Yourself
This can mean writing down all the mistakes you have made, and to develop a way to forgive yourself. Let others know you are sorry for hurting them, if you have done so, and begin to treat yourself with kindness and compassion. This begins the healing process and helps you start to get to the root of why you are emotionally unavailable.
Start Going To Group Therapy
You will actually enjoy the process of going to group therapy. It is a way to be open and honest with yourself to others. We all have issues, and when we can talk about them it helps to release all the pent up hurts to clear the way for healthier thoughts and feelings to grow. It all starts with the willingness to release the past, and begin to think better thoughts about healthy, post[equity, and loving relationships. There are people all around us who have a balanced life. You can have it too. Group therapy helps us to release our feelings in a safe environment.
Do Things That Build You Up
Often when we are working to become emotionally available for our friends and family, doing activities with people that build us up help polish us into stronger and more confident people. Spend time with people that celebrate you and make you feel good, and in turn, celebrate your friends for their amazing characteristics and rejoice that you have good relationships. Friends make life a great place to live. In fact, when you do sports activities with friends, you build a memory that trend gens your relationships. When you do healthy activities and creative activities, you grow as a person.
From Emotionally Unavailable To Emotionally Available
Through all this, remember that it is possible to be emotionally available as a single person. You can begin being emotionally available when you are ready to build deeper and more meaningful relationships. It is possible for you to be able to connect with people, and to live a fulfilling life with others. You can begin today by following the simple process. Live the life you desire, and be a full single person. You can do it, and you can begin today to start the process. You are worth it!
Cheers,
Danielle
Views expressed in this article are the author’s opinions and do not necessarily reflect the views of Secure Single. It is intended for informational and educational purposes only. It is not investment or financial advice. James Bollen is the author of Thriving Solo: How to Flourish and Live Your Perfect Life (Without A Soulmate). Now available in paperback and for the Kindle on Amazon. Subscribe to Secure Single’s Substack for free!
The fall and winter seasons are a time when singles are expected to find a significant other. This time is called cuffing season. It is called cuffing season because it is believed that singles desire to be cuffed or tied down to a serious relationship and to bring a significant other back home during the holidays. There is no reason why singles should be expected to become cuffed to someone during fall and winter to please their family or society during the holidays.
What Is Cuffing Season?
It is interesting that dating relationships equate to cuffs during this season. In contrast to the values of the single life, romantic relationships take away peoples’ freedom and flexibility to be with another person. By spending time with that person; they take time away from personal development, self-discovery, and improving their professional skills as an individual. The energy that would go into advancing yourself as a person are now spend wholly with someone else.
The hypothesis behind why cuffing season exists is because as the weather gets colder during the fall and winter months and people stay indoors more, they want to date someone to cuddle and spend time with instead of being alone. This is a fascinating theory for cuffing season because the number of social events increase during the fall and winter holiday season. Singles can find events to attend in there city and that does not require having a plus one. By spending time with others, the desire to get cuffed this holiday season may decline because it is healthy to be around people. There is also nothing wrong with watching Netflix and drinking hot cocoa on your couch in your house or apartment. It is actually healthy to spend time alone. Singles should not feel shame or pressure to get cuffed into a relationship.
Be Free During Cuffing Season
There is pressure to get cuffed and to have a date for New Year’s and Valentine’s Day. These are unhealthy expectations for singles. In fact, the pressure for singles to get cuffed for the holiday season is just wrong. Singles are now the majority of the American population and are a rising demographic in industrialized countries. Society’s assumption that people are best coupled stigmatizes singles and is singlism. The holiday season should be a time where people spend time with family and friends. There should not be pressure for singles to get date during cuffing season.
Singles should be happy and uncuffed during cuffing season because there is nothing fun about being tied down to a bad relationship. Singles should spend time exploring their city or going home to their families during the holidays instead of seeking out a romantic relationship. Remain free and uncuffed!
Views expressed in this article are the author’s opinions and do not necessarily reflect the views of Secure Single. It is intended for informational and educational purposes only. It is not investment or financial advice. James Bollen is the author of Thriving Solo: How to Flourish and Live Your Perfect Life (Without A Soulmate). Now available in paperback and for the Kindle on Amazon. Subscribe to Secure Single’s Substack for free!
Being single is a universal state that everyone can relate to, because at one point or another everyone has been single. During this holiday season, we all know that if you are in your 20’s and 30’s without a significant other, then people are going to be asking what’s up. The key is to keep calm and carry on. Here are some tips to keep your cool while being a charming guest at any dinner party over the holidays.
Relate Being Single Back to the Person Asking the Question
Feeling singled out for being single? Reverse the question, and ask what your family member or friend enjoyed most about their single times. Make it relate-able. You can keep it light and friendly, there is no need to sweat. I am sure everyone can relate to a time in their life they enjoyed while being single. It is deemed one of the most important times when you make decisions. You might also add in that you enjoy what you have going on at the current moment, and are happy for your fiends and family members who have a significant other. Appreciation goes a long way.
Benefits of the Single Life
Single + Freedom are two words that go together nicely. Not to say that some couples have freedom, it just is easier when you have one person to look out for. Think about the positives: you can live wherever you choose, you can travel where you want, you can change careers, you can freelance and work 12 hour days and not feel guilty about it. You also tend to have a larger group of friends when you are single. Hey, rejoice that your happy about being single! It’s all about focusing on the positives.
Express that You are Taking Time to get to Know Yourself
No person will rightfully make you feel guilty about being single. Perhaps you’ve taken a break to clear some emotional air, and need time to develop your spirituality, your career, and your values. We are all in this together. If your friends are understanding, they will love you no matter what. If they judge you, then hey you might need to find friends that celebrate you. Just be yourself, and let people know where your at. Sometimes people just need an answer, and as the confident single person you are, you can say that you are gearing up to backpack across Europe while you build up your freelance career and find yourself. Wahoo!
Summary
This holiday season don’t have the blues. Remember that you are a fantastic human being and are worthy of love and appreciation. Being single is great, and you should appreciate what you have right now. Life should be an exciting adventure, so live it up, find your passion for career, and take it to the next level. During this time, allow yourself to make discoveries about yourself. When you love and appreciate who you are, and make progress towards accomplishing career and health goals, you might just meet someone in the same walk of life. Enjoy your life, and love what you do, it will make this time being single a lot more fun – and trust me, you are worth it to be able to enjoy your life. Live it up!
Cheers,
Danielle
Views expressed in this article are the author’s opinions and do not necessarily reflect the views of Secure Single. It is intended for informational and educational purposes only. It is not investment or financial advice. James Bollen is the author of Thriving Solo: How to Flourish and Live Your Perfect Life (Without A Soulmate). Now available in paperback and for the Kindle on Amazon. Subscribe to Secure Single’s Substack for free!
In order to live a complete and fulfilled life, it is essential to have strong and deep meaningful relationships with the people who bring us up and bring out the best in us. Millennials are in the constant grind of completing college and getting established in the workforce. It can be a rat race, and our lives can be stressful and lonely. To combat those low-level feelings, we need a team of people we can count on emotionally. Good relationships bounce us backup after we have fallen. It is up to us to nurture and foster a loving environment for our relationships to become deep and meaningful. Here are three ways you can improve your relationships today!
Spend Time With Loved Ones
Time flies by, so spend time with your friends. Make time to be with your friends and plan activities around relaxation, being in nature, and working out. Drinking is nice to do if it’s a special holiday or birthday, but alcohol tends to make things worse if you are working to improve relationships. Be present, be attentive, and stay focused. These are important relationships you need to work, to try your best to be completely present for each person who is special in your life. It’s important, and you need to be emotionally available to help your friends when they need you!
Be Honest About Your Life Experience
Too often, we keep secrets from others because we are afraid of what they will think. Take a moment to meditate on why you do this. Is it because you are afraid others will not like the real you? If so, why are you pretending to be someone else? Come as you are and welcome your authentic, non-ego self into the present. You will feel more comfortable in your skin. By being open and honest about your life experiences, you are being your authentic self. You are being, you! In truth, you will attract the right people if you are yourself, and if you are not being yourself then you will attract people who are not like you and may not ultimately approve of yourself. Be you, do your best, and know that you are a diamond!
Trust Your Friends
Until proven differently, work hard to trust people you care about. It can be hard to trust if you grew up in a household where you weren’t loved, or even had a lover or friend you trusted deeply break that trust. To live complete, begin to trust again. Being hurt is temporary, so learn to let go and focus on what is happening now. Do not worry if you are uncertain of the future, you have absolutely no control over the future, you only have control over the current moment. Holding on to the past or worrying about the future will only keep you from loving and enjoying the present moment. Learn to let go, learn to trust, and learn to love life and enjoy it to the fullest. You are worthy of love and trust, so start today to show your friends you love them by trusting them completely.
Start today by intentionally making an active effort to do your best to improve relationships by being attentive and being your true self. When you open up and trust life, life tends to be there for us. Make sure you do your best every day, show up on time, make things work, and be happy. Every day is a new day for a fresh start. If is your life, so take back control today!