Should single men date? Society wants men to feel pressure from women to date and marry. This is especially true with cuffing season, which happens during the holidays. There are more critical things men can work on rather than seeking out a romantic relationship. Here are ten reasons for single men to avoid dating women during the holiday season.
10 Reasons For Single Men To Avoid Dating Women During The Holiday Season
Learn Game
Single men can learn game. It is then up to men to decide the relationships they want to pursue. It could be one-night stands or get into a more serious relationship eventually. Game can help men to develop self-confidence.
Game requires men to work to understand female psychology. It requires men to know about hypergamy. Men who choose to take the red pill do it to better themselves instead of always being on the lookout for a mate.
Save Money
Save money. Stay out of debt. Follow a budget. Learn the basics of money management. Work to reach the first two financial goals: to have a minimum of $10,000 saved in an emergency fund, then make your first $100,000.
Related – 50/30/20 Budget Versus 60/30/10 Budget
Invest Money
Start to invest money as soon as possible. Start small by putting money away in a high-interest savings account and money market fund. Invest money in the stock market, real estate, or business.
There are many types of investments outside of the stock market. Play to your strengths. Once you have money from one successful investment, reinvest some money into another investment to diversify your risk across asset classes.
Related – 15 Habits To Build Wealth For Singles
Build Passive Income Streams
Work to build passive income streams. The Internet has made it easier to create passive income streams. It is best to play to your strengths when looking to develop the first stream of passive income. You can then use the passive income streams to build an online business.
Start An Online Business
Start an online business. A business is the ultimate asset because you can continue to find ways to grow it and create revenue streams. There are many ways to monetize an online business today. Some strategies include:
- Advertisements on a website, YouTube, TikTok, or other social media platforms.
- Subscription services.
- Subscription newsletters (Substack or your own paid newsletter).
- Sell merch.
- Get a sponsor for content.
- Affiliate marketing.
- Sell digital products.
- Sell physical products.
- Provide a service to customers.
- Be a coach or consultant.
A business is a financial asset. Once the business starts to make money, you can pay yourself monthly from the income it generates. The objective of a business is to make a profit. Companies do that by providing products and services there is market demand.
Health
Single men can focus on their health. They can go to the gym. Regularly exercise. Follow a diet that they think works best. Get enough sunlight each day for Vitamin D.
Men can work to stay lean, fit, and build muscle. Looking your best can help men to be more confident in their professional and everyday lives. Self-confidence plays a vital role in success.
Hone Hard Skills
Hard skills are the most vital skills. Soft skills help with interpersonal relationships. It is hard skills that can help single men earn money, improve skills for work, and learn skills for business. The Interview Guys break down 112 examples of hard skills. Hard skills include:
- Data analysis
- QuickBooks
- Photoshop
- Video editing
- Bookkeeping
- Profit forecasting
- Statistics
- Automation
- Machine operation
- Forklift driving
- Google Analytics
- Graphic design
- Copywriting
- Carpentry
- Plumbing
- Electrical
- Nutrition
- Surgery
- Typing
- Sale pitches
Master one skill you are naturally good at in an area of interest, then move on to learn more skills. Many skills will overlap with each other. For example, sales skills naturally lend themselves to marketing and business.
Solitude
There are benefits to spending time in solitude. Solitude helps with creativity, productivity, and increasing focus. Instead of being distracted by social media, a romantic relationship, or steaming content, you can spend time in solitude to help you reach your goals.
There is no reason always to socialize. Learn your interests, be productive, and spend time working to reach your goals. People can be distractions. Solitude can be a time to invest in yourself!
Related – Alone Versus Lonely
Invest In Yourself
Society tells men to focus on romantic relationships. If men are not dating, then they are losers. It is best to invest in yourself. It is vital for men to work to increase their income, grow their net worth, and continue developing skills.
Once you are financially stable, men can decide if they want to date or remain single. There is nothing wrong with either choice. People are staying single for longer today.
The best investment is in yourself. Invest in yourself first before you start to invest in others.
Travel Abroad
Travel abroad. Traveling is an excellent way to expose yourself to other cultures, traditions, and values different from your country. Try to avoid the main tourist locations as much as possible when traveling. It is best to go where the locals go when traveling. Traveling can help you to broaden your views about the world.
If you make enough money, consider investing in a second passport or country you enjoy. Live there part-time or full-time.
When I traveled to Greece with my dad before college, we had a great cab driver. The cab driver drove us around the lower parts of Greece for our trip. He helped us stay in the local hotels and find the best restaurants rather than just going to the more expensive tourist traps.
Related – Solo Travel: Tip for Trips for Singles to See the World Alone
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The Power Of Going Your Own Way
Summary
Cuffing season is here. Men will feel pressure to date from friends and family. Ultimately, it is best for single men to invest in themselves.
Avoid dating women. Avoid romantic relationships. Invest in yourself to thrive as a single person!
Views expressed in this article are opinions of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of Secure Single. It is intended for informational and educational purposes only. James Bollen is the author of Thriving Solo: How to Flourish and Live Your Perfect Life (Without A Soulmate). Now available in paperback on Amazon. Subscribe to Secure Single’s Substack for free!
There are many distractions you can focus on: romantic relationships, politics, and the news. Instead of focusing on external distractions, begin to invest in yourself. Self-investment is the best way to thrive.
7 Types Of Self-Investment
Self-investment means that you invest in yourself. There are many ways to do that:
• Self-education
• Personal finance
• Self-development
• Learn to cook
• Health
• Relationships
• Monetize your passion
Self-Education
Self-education plays a more critical role in one’s life than the education system. Self-study allows a person to learn more about what they find interesting. Self-education is one characteristic of self-made millionaires.
You can become a master of a topic or field through self-study. No fancy overpriced college degree is required.
Related – 12 Reasons Why Young People Should Not Go To College
Personal Finance
Personal finance plays a critical role in people’s daily lives. Master the basics of personal finance before working to move on to more advanced strategies to increase your income. The basics are:
- Stay out of debt
- Live below your means
- Follow a budget
- Spend less money than you make each month
- Save money
- Invest money
- Build an emergency fund
- Find ways to increase your income
- Build passive income streams
Start with the basics. Once the basics are done, focus on more advanced personal fiancé strategies like building passive income streams and starting an online business.
Related – 50/30/20 Budget Versus 60/30/10 Budget
Self-development
Self-development is concerned with working on oneself. Ultimately, each person must decide what is most important to them. A range of skills fall under the category of personal development:
- Hard skills
- Soft skills
- Interpersonal relationships
- Intrapersonal relationship
- Managing money
- Time management
- Develop a growth mindset
- Resiliency
- Mindfulness
- Practice gratitude
Learn To Cook
Learn to cook. Cooking is a way to save money. It is cheaper to make a meal for oneself than go out to eat or buy pre-prepared food. Start to use the kitchen more. Find and make simple recipes. Freeze the leftovers.
Health
Health is critical. There are many reasons to pay attention to personal health. When your health is terrible, you may be unable to work or be productive. Some ways to focus on health are:
- Regularly exercise
- Go to the gym
- Go for a daily walk
- Get enough sleep
- Get exposed to the sunlight for Vitamin D
- Regularly see a doctor
- Follow a healthy diet
- Lose weight
- Autophagy
Relationships
Relationships play a vital role in one’s life. The range of relationships include:
- Acquaintances
- Friends
- Colleagues at work
- Professional relationships (LinkedIn and professional networking)
- Community
- Family
- Romantic relationships
- Relationship with oneself
You must decide which relationship you want to focus on during each period of life. It will change as you mature and reach different life goals. There are times when it is best to develop oneself, while other times you may want to work to build a community around you where you live.
Find Ways To Monetize Your Passion
Jobs come and go, but you may never be out of work if you can find ways to monetize your passion. You will also enjoy work and want to do it each day. The Internet has made it easier to discover your interests. You no longer need to go to college, study, get a degree, and hope it works out. You can learn from people online by watching videos and purchasing digital courses.
You can then work to build your online presence. Build a business around a passion in a niche. People may eventually find you. You can then make money from:
- Advertisements
- Merch
- Digital products
- Physical products
- Services
- Subscriptions
- Royalties
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Summary
Self-investment is the best investment you can make. Focus on your health, learn to cook, master the basics of personal finance, cook for yourself, prioritize your health, develop relationships, and work to monetize your passion.
Views expressed in this article are opinions of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of Secure Single. James Bollen is the author of Thriving Solo: How to Flourish and Live Your Perfect Life (Without A Soulmate). Now available in paperback on Amazon. Subscribe to Secure Single’s Substack for free!
CNBC reports that Chipotle plans to raise prices again. You can learn to make your own burritos at home if you are a Chipotle burritos fan. As Chipotle raises prices, try these three simple burrito recipes for one!
Chipotle Raises Prices: 3 Simple Burrito Recipes For One
Chicken Burrito
- ¼ pound cooked boneless chicken breast or thighs
- ¼ medium yellow onion
- ¼ medium red bell pepper
- ½ of a garlic clove
- ¼ of a medium lime
- 1 sprig of fresh cilantro
- ¼ can of pinto beans
- ¼ cup warm cooked white rice
- 1/8 teaspoon kosher salt
- ¼ teaspoon vegetable oil
- ¼ teaspoon taco seasoning (homemade or store-bought)
- ¼ cup shredded cheese of choice or Mexican blend cheese
- 1 large flour tortilla
- 1 tablespoon sour cream
- 1 tablespoon guacamole
- 3 tablespoons jarred salsa
Instructions
- You can chop, shred, or dice the chicken breast or thigh. Measure one-quarter pound of chicken on a kitchen scale.
- Trim and cut a quarter of the onion and bell pepper. Mince the ½ clove of garlic. Finely grate the zest of ¼ of a medium lime. Juice a quarter of the lime. Chop the one sprig of fresh cilantro. Drain, rinse, and measure out a quarter can of pinto beans.
- Place the lime zest, cilantro, lime juice, ¼ cup of cooked warm rice, and 1/8 teaspoon kosher salt into a small bow. Stir and combine ingredients in the bow.
- Heat ¼ teaspoon vegetable oil in a large skillet on medium-high. Let the vegetable oil simmer. Add your onion and bell pepper. Sauté until the onion and bell pepper are golden brown and tender, about four to five minutes. Transfer the ingredients to a plate.
- Return the large skillet to the stovetop. Reduce the heat to medium-low. Add your beans, garlic, chicken; use any remaining lime juice, ¼ teaspoon taco seasoning, and 3 tablespoons of salsa. Simmer in pan until the liquid evaporates, and the ingredients are entirely heated through. One to two minutes. Now, remove the pan from the stovetop.
- Set one large flour tortilla on a microwave-safe plate. Cover with a slightly damp paper towel. Heat up in the microwave until warm, roughly thirty seconds.
- Now, dress your tortilla. Layer your ¼ cup of shredded or Mexican cheese, ¼ cup warm white rice, ¼ pound of chicken breast or thigh, place ¼ yellow onion and bell pepper, 1 tablespoon of sour cream and 1 tablespoon guacamole, and 1 tablespoon of salsa across the warm tortilla. Add more toppings as desired. Fold the burrito in half. It is now ready to serve!
Beef Burrito
- ¼ pound cooked ground beef
- ¼ medium yellow onion
- ¼ medium red bell pepper
- ½ of a garlic clove
- ¼ of a medium lime
- 1 sprig of fresh cilantro
- ¼ can of pinto beans
- ¼ cup warm cooked white rice
- 1/8 teaspoon kosher salt
- ¼ teaspoon vegetable oil
- ¼ teaspoon taco seasoning (homemade or store-bought)
- ¼ cup shredded cheese of choice or Mexican blend cheese
- 1 large flour tortilla
- 1 tablespoon sour cream
- 1 tablespoon guacamole
- 3 tablespoons jarred salsa
Instructions
- Measure out ¼ pound of ground beef.
- Trim and cut a quarter of the onion and bell pepper. Mince the ½ clove of garlic. Finely grate the zest of ¼ of a medium lime. Juice a quarter of the lime. Chop the one sprig of fresh cilantro. Drain, rinse, and measure out a quarter can of pinto beans.
- Place the lime zest, cilantro, lime juice, ¼ cup of cooked warm rice, and 1/8 teaspoon kosher salt into a small bow. Stir and combine ingredients in the bow.
- Heat ¼ teaspoon vegetable oil in a large skillet on medium-high. Let the vegetable oil simmer. Add your onion and bell pepper. Sauté until the onion and bell pepper are golden brown and tender, about four to five minutes. Transfer the ingredients to a plate.
- Return the large skillet to the stovetop. Reduce the heat to medium-low. Add your beans, garlic, ground beef; use any remaining lime juice, ¼ teaspoon taco seasoning, and 3 tablespoons of salsa. Simmer in pan until the liquid evaporates, and the ingredients are entirely heated through. One to two minutes. Now, remove the pan from the stovetop.
- Set one large flour tortilla on a microwave-safe plate. Cover with a slightly damp paper towel. Heat up in the microwave until warm, roughly thirty seconds.
- Now, dress your tortilla. Layer your ¼ cup of shredded or Mexican cheese, ¼ cup warm white rice, ¼ pound of ground beef, place ¼ yellow onion and bell pepper, 1 tablespoon of sour cream and 1 tablespoon guacamole, and 1 tablespoon of salsa across the warm. Add more toppings as desired. Fold the burrito in half. It is now ready to serve!
Pork Burrito
- ¼ pound pork chops or pork shoulder (carnitas)
- ¼ medium yellow onion
- ¼ medium red bell pepper
- ½ of a garlic clove
- ¼ of a medium lime
- 1 sprig of fresh cilantro
- ¼ can of pinto beans
- ¼ cup warm cooked white rice
- 1/8 teaspoon kosher salt
- ¼ teaspoon vegetable oil
- ¼ teaspoon taco seasoning (homemade or store-bought)
- ¼ cup shredded cheese of choice or Mexican blend cheese
- 1 large flour tortilla
- 1 tablespoon sour cream
- 1 tablespoon guacamole
- 3 tablespoons jarred salsa
Instructions
- Measure out ¼ pound of pork chop or carnitas.
- Trim and cut a quarter of the onion and bell pepper. Mince the ½ clove of garlic. Finely grate the zest of ¼ of a medium lime. Juice a quarter of the lime. Chop the one sprig of fresh cilantro. Drain, rinse, and measure out a quarter can of pinto beans.
- Place the lime zest, cilantro, lime juice, ¼ cup of cooked warm rice, and 1/8 teaspoon kosher salt into a small bow. Stir and combine ingredients in the bow.
- Heat ¼ teaspoon vegetable oil in a large skillet on medium-high. Let the vegetable oil simmer. Add your onion and bell pepper. Sauté until the onion and bell pepper are golden brown and tender, about four to five minutes. Transfer the ingredients to a plate.
- Return the large skillet to the stovetop. Reduce the heat to medium-low. Add your beans, garlic, pork chop or pork shoulder; use any remaining lime juice, ¼ teaspoon of taco seasoning, and 3 tablespoons of salsa. Simmer in a pan until the liquid evaporates, and the ingredients are entirely heated through—about ten to twenty minutes for the porkchop and pork shoulder. Check with a meat thermometer to make sure the meat is fully cooked. Now, remove the pan from the stovetop.
- Set one large flour tortilla on a microwave-safe plate. Cover with a slightly damp paper towel. Heat up in the microwave until warm, roughly thirty seconds.
- Now, dress your tortilla. Layer your ¼ cup of shredded or Mexican cheese, ¼ cup warm white rice, ¼ pound of pork chop or pork shoulder, place ¼ yellow onion and bell pepper, 1 tablespoon of sour cream and 1 tablespoon guacamole, and 1 tablespoon of salsa across the warm. Add more toppings as desired. Fold the burrito in half. It is now ready to serve!
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Conclusion
Prices continue to rise due to inflation. Cooking at home is one of the best ways to save money rather than spending money going out. You can enjoy these simple burrito recipes for one and skip spending money at Chipotle. You could instead save that money or find a way to make the money you would have spent going out to work to find ways to increase your income.
Views expressed in this article are opinions of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of Secure Single. James Bollen is the author of Thriving Solo: How to Flourish and Live Your Perfect Life (Without A Soulmate). Now available in paperback on Amazon. Subscribe to Secure Single’s Substack for free!
There is pressure for single people to date and marry. Despite that pressure, here are seven surprising reasons I have always been single and never dated.
Surprising Reasons I Have Always Been Single And Never Dated
Time
Romantic relationships require time. I have never been into the pickup culture or one-night stands.
You need to plan time for dates. You must make an effort to spend time with a significant other. You have to deal with a romantic relationship’s emotional and other issues.
I have always focused on things like growing this website and my career. Those are perfectly fine reasons to remain single in the modern age. It does not make sense to consider dating, let alone getting married, if you cannot support another person, let alone a family.
Education
I made the mistake of believing the myth that college was required to have a career. College was all right. My undergraduate degree in Political Science did not help me at all jobwise. I had the same experience with graduate school.
My biggest mistake was deciding to go to graduate school. I later discovered I had one class left to graduate with my Master’s in Information and Cybersecurity. But, after going through a few interviews, I later found out that no employers wanted to hire me because I did not come from the proper work background.
That is just one example that attending college and getting a fancy degree in something will not help you to be successful career-wise. You must be able to pass interviews, have good social skills, and be able to bullshit employers. All of which I have never been good at.
College and graduate school did not help me build a career. The best thing I ever did for my career was start this website and focus on self-education.
Self-education is better than any overpriced fancy college degree.
Related – 12 Reasons Why Young People Should Not Go To College
Career
I have always been ambitious and entrepreneurial. I initially believed I must attend college to get a good job. That is the old way of becoming successful. The new way to become successful is to create and sell content.
I was unaware of this when I started this website in December 2015. I am now working to write a series of books and improve this website. All of which is backend work that no one sees.
I would have never been a good fit for a regular job. I do not get along with most people. I do not like group settings. I am better off working with myself and managing freelancers when I need to delegate work.
Related – 9 Reasons Why You Want To Hire Freelancers With An Online Business
Open To Opportunities
I have been open to new opportunities. An opportunity may have been learning a new skill, traveling, or trying something new. I have no problems with taking calculated risks. Opportunities and taking risks are two of the best ways to learn. You learn by taking action, not by reading from a college textbook.
Lack Of Social Skills
I have always been more introverted. I do not have great social skills. I would probably be in the bottom fifty percent when it comes to soft skills. This is one reason I have always had difficulty moving up in a traditional career. Employers place too much emphasis on social skills.
Social skills often play a vital role when it comes to relationships. If you come across as socially awkward or uninterested, even if you are, it will be interpreted that way. For this reason, I have always tried to improve my skills, even though I know I will never be among the top percentile of verbal and non-verbal communicators. Those skills also play a vital role in business relationships.
Related –Life As A Single Woman Uber Driver [The Give Economy Experience]
Speech Issues
I have always had speech issues and a lack of social skills. I have had speech therapy since kindergarten. I have largely improved since then, but compared to the top ten to thirty percent of people, I am not very persuasive and cannot verbally get my point across to someone. This has primarily affected my role in the types of traditional jobs I have been able to get.
I have mostly worked randon gig jobs, sales jobs, and other entry-level positions, despite my “higher level education.” Social skills and speech are critical in ascending in regular companies, which I have never had. Today, it is all about your connections, who you know, and being able to talk your way through an interview to get a good-paying job. Employers seem today to care more about how good of a bullshitter you are compared to if you are proficient.
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- How Is Self-Discipline The Key To Success?
Conclusion
This is not to say that I may never date or marry, but I have other priorities and things to work on first. The Internet has created ways to make money outside of the regular nine-to-five working for an employer. My website has allowed me to learn how to make money online. I would never have been a great fit for a medium to large business. It ended up working out for me.
No matter your situation. Know that you have options. The riskier option is usually better, but society will discourage you from taking it. Society wants you to be mediocre. Choose to be exceptional.
James Bollen is the author of Thriving Solo: How to Flourish and Live Your Perfect Life (Without A Soulmate). Now available in paperback on Amazon. Subscribe to Secure Single’s Substack for free!
Secure Single was ranked among the 25 best single life blogs and websites in 2023 by FeedSpot. We are grateful to receive recognition from FeedSpot by placing Secure Single in the top ten best single life blogs and websites.
Secure Single will continue to provide content that will help you to invest in yourself to thrive as a single person!
Views expressed in this article are the author’s opinions and do not necessarily reflect the views of Secure Single. It is intended for informational and educational purposes only. It is not investment or financial advice. James Bollen is the author of Thriving Solo: How to Flourish and Live Your Perfect Life (Without A Soulmate). Now available in paperback and for the Kindle on Amazon. Subscribe to Secure Single’s Substack for free!
Why would someone be single by choice? There are many different reasons why a person could be single. This article will answer the question, what does it mean to be single by choice?
What Does It Mean To Be Single By Choice?
Single by choice means that someone has decided to be single. They enjoy being single and everything that comes with the single life.
Why Would Someone Be Single By Choice?
Someone who is single by choice could have decided they prefer being single instead of being involved in romantic relationships. They have decided that they like the single life instead of dating, living with a partner, or making the decision to get married.
Related – Single By Choice: Single, Unavailable, and Off the Market
Is There Anything Wrong With Being Single By Choice?
No, there is nothing wrong with someone deciding to be single by choice.
Are There Any Negative Views Of People Who Are Single By Choice?
The negative views of people who are single by choice are from society. Society pushes the narrative that everyone must date, marry, have two and a half kids, and then get a house with a white picket fence. Those who are single by choice go against that societal narrative, so they are presented as being less than people who are dating, living with a partner, married, or have children.
Popular – 15 Legitimate Reasons Why Men Are Choosing To Stay Single And Are Giving Up On Women
Where Can Someone Who Is Single By Choice Be From?
Someone who single by choice can be from anywhere in the world.
Who Can Be Single By Choice?
Both men and women can be single by choice. They only need to decide that they prefer being single and have no interest in pursuing romantic relationships.
When Can Someone Be Single By Choice?
It can be a decision that can be made at any time in life. Some could have gotten out of a bad romantic relationship and decided they don’t want to be involved anymore, so they want to remain single. Another person may have always enjoyed being single and made the decision sometime in their life to be single by choice.
How Can Someone Make The Most Of Being Single By Choice?
For someone who is single by choice, there are four main areas they can focus on developing to make the most of being single.
Relationships
People are naturally social creatures, which makes relationships important. However, not all relationships are romantic. You can focus on four types of relationships as a single.
Intrapersonal
The most important relationship is the one with yourself. You can work to develop self-confidence. You can work to get your self-worth from your accomplishments. The sooner you can learn your strengths, weaknesses, and what you are passionate about, the quicker you will be able to get to where you want to be.
Related – The Complete Guide For How To Focus On Yourself
Friends
You can work to develop quality friendships with people. You can have a range of friendships, from acquaintances to best friends. The acquaintances will be people you may casually see or meet going to bars or restaurants. You may have some closer friends you know better because you have similar interests or values. You may even have a best friend.
If you can find a best friend, then consider yourself lucky. Many people do not have a close or a best friend. You likely share many things in common with that person who may be a best friend from common values, shared worldview, and have known the friend for a long time. You have been able to maintain and deepen that friendship over time.
Family
You can also spend time with your family. It could be with your parents or siblings if they live nearby. Of course, not all families get along. Family is a built-in natural social connection that you can utilize to be social. You could do weekly, or monthly Skype calls. You could go over to your parents’ or siblings’ house for dinner once a month.
Community
You can also work to find a community where you live. A good starting place to find a community to get involved in today is Meetup. You can find a Meetup group around one of the main interests in your area. You can then find a group and meet new people.
Another way is to get involved by doing activities around your core interests. You may enjoy exercising, so you could meet people at the gym or in a yoga class. You may be spiritual or religious, so that you could meet people on a spiritual retreat or at a local church.
Related – 15 Ways To Have A Thriving Social Life As A Single!
Health
You will also have more time to focus on your health when you are single. You can focus on three main areas of health.
Diet
You can figure out a diet that fits your lifestyle. There are a variety of diets available today that you can try. You can pick the one that works best with your lifestyle and the health goals you want to achieve. Popular diets include the Mediterranean Diet, Carnivore Diet, Keto Diet, Vegetarian Diet, Vegan Diet, and Paleo Diet. You can consistently exercise to help you reach your health and fitness goals.
Exercise
You can regularly exercise. You could go for a walk each day. You could go on a hike. You could go to the gym for more serious workouts. Exercise, along with following a diet, will help you to lose weight and look your best. It can also help lower blood pressure. When you exercise consistently, you will begin to feel and look better.
Gym
You can build your own gym or join a gym near you. A gym can provide a form of community when you begin recognizing regulars at your gym. If you want to improve your form when lifting weights or work to reach a specific goal, you could consider working with a personal trainer. You can also go to the gym regularly to work to meet different goals, such as losing weight, getting ripped, or wanting to get lean.
Solo Travel
There are many ways that you could solo travel. Here are two simple options when it comes to solo travel.
Explore Your Area
You can begin by exploring the area where you live. This could be the town or city where you live. You could try different bars and restaurants and attend events in your area. Once you have become familiar with your area, you could expand and explore further by traveling to another city or state and throughout your country.
Travel To A Different Country
Is there a country that you have always wanted to explore? You can also travel to a country. You could figure out a country that sounds interesting to you. You can then research the requirements to visit the country. Then you can get your passport and necessary travel documents in order. You can then plan your trip by going through a travel agency or booking your flights, hotel or Airbnb to stay at, and sites that you want to see on your trip.
Money
Money makes the world go round. It is also needed to live. Here are four ways to begin to manage and grow your money.
Save Money
You can save a percentage of your monthly paycheck or yearly income. You can save a minimum of ten percent. You could also follow the 50/30/20 budgeting rule that says to have fifty percent of your income go towards your needs like rent and food. Then thirty percent goes towards your wants like entertainment. The final twenty percent goes into your savings account. Once you have enough money saved, you can invest or start your own venture. A good starting number to aim for is to save $30,000. That can then be your emergency or FU Fund.
Find Side Hustles
You can find side hustles to work alongside your full-time job to earn extra money. You could potentially turn this into your full-time thing once it gets going enough to replace your current job. Some common side hustles include Uber and GrubHub. You could also do some freelancing on the side through UpWork or Fiverr to earn extra money. You could be a virtual assistant, write articles, copywriting, analytics, and anything else that you may enjoy or have skills at to make extra money. Your side hustle could later turn into your full-time gig. You could also start your own website or YouTube Channel.
Related – Life As A Single Woman Uber Driver (The Gig Economy Experience]
Build Up Your Net Worth
You want to continually find ways to build up your net worth. You could invest in the stock market. You could learn about value and growth stocks. You could learn about cryptocurrency. You could invest in real estate. You could also start your own business. Today, a business does not need to be a brick-and-mortar physical business; you could start an online business.
Find Ways To Create Multiple Passive Income Streams
In the Internet Age, there are many ways to create passive income streams. The problem with relying on one employer’s income stream is that it can vanish anytime. That is why it is a good idea to find ways to make passive income streams. You can make money today from advertisements, affiliate programs, self-publishing a book, creating and selling digital products, consulting, and your imagination is your only limit. The only thing stopping you is you.
Conclusion
Single by choice is only one of many reasons why a person could be single. The person who is single by choice has just decided that they enjoy being single. They enjoy the single life the most and feel that dating and getting married is not for them. There is nothing wrong with that.
Views expressed in this article are the author’s opinions and do not necessarily reflect the views of Secure Single. It is intended for informational and educational purposes only. It is not investment or financial advice. James Bollen is the author of Thriving Solo: How to Flourish and Live Your Perfect Life (Without A Soulmate). Now available in paperback and for the Kindle on Amazon. Subscribe to Secure Single’s Substack for free!
Why does society make people feel frustrated about being single? Can you be happy single? Yes, you can be happy single! Here are thirty ways you can be happy single!
30 Ways To Be Happy Single!
Mindset Shift
Mindset is everything! If you have a poor mindset, you remain stuck where you are. Her are three types of mindsets to be aware of.
Change How You Think About Being Single
You can work to shift your mindset regarding how you view being single. Society presents being single in a negative light.
It will ultimately depend on you if you can change your mindset regarding how you think about being single. How do you view being single? Once you shift your perspective, your life changes for the better.
Fixed Mindset
A fixed mindset limits your options. It makes you stay where you are because you believe you can’t do things. A fixed mindset uses statements such as “I can’t do x” or “I’m unable to do x because of [insert excuse].” Another problem with a fixed mindset is that a person with a fixed mindset often believes that skills and knowledge are set from birth. This means that they must naturally be talented at something to become successful. They are unable to improve themselves through development or growth.
Growth Mindset
In contrast to the fixed mindset is the growth mindset. A growth mindset uses statements such as “I can do something” or “I can do it. I need to learn how.” A growth mindset recognizes that skills and talent can be learned. When you have a growth mindset, you continually work to improve yourself in different areas of your life.
Solo Travel
One of the many benefits of being single is having the freedom of a single life. You can enjoy your space as a single person by traveling! It could mean traveling to a nearby city. It could mean visiting another state. It could mean traveling to another country. Don’t be afraid to travel or to talk to a stranger because you never know what could happen.
Related – Solo Travel: Tips For Trips For Singles To See the World Alone
Life Experiences
Traveling is a great way to gain valuable life experience. It may mean going on a trip to another country and creating memories you remember for the rest of your life. Another way could be going out to talk to people at a bar, lounger, or restaurant so that you can also have engaging life experiences. Your life experiences set you apart from your peers more than a college degree.
Life Lessons
You learn vital essential life lessons. Whether driving to a nearby town, going on a solo trip, or from people you meet in the city where you live. If you pay attention to what people tell you, especially those older, you can learn from their mistakes and become successful in life sooner.
Learn From Others
You can learn from others when you talk to someone online, at a bar, or when you meet someone on a trip abroad. You can learn from another country’s culture and traditions when you travel abroad that are different from your home country. You can also learn from others you meet by having a conversation with other people whom you meet. They may tell you stories that you can learn from. They may say to you precisely what they regret doing in their life. They may also teach you valuable skills that you may later use in life. It is up to you whether you want to heed the life lessons and learn from others or to learn things the hard way by learning things on your own.
Relationships
Romantic relationships get the most attention, but there are both positive and negative relationships to be aware of on your journey to being happy single.
External Validation
Relationships, no matter the type, are a form of external validation. Most people have friends so that they can do things that they don’t have to be alone. People seem to think that there is a problem with spending time alone. When you get validation from others, you may find yourself over-socializing. This will result in you spending less time learning hard skills and working on yourself.
Relationship With Yourself
The most complicated relationship to have is with yourself. You know all your weaknesses, shortcomings, and regrets. If you cannot accept yourself, you continue to be hard on yourself. You continue to be your own worst enemy.
Once you shift the mindset to accepting yourself and having a relationship with yourself by knowing yourself, you begin to succeed. You can start to have a more positive outlook on life. You begin to feel better about yourself. You also start to feel less stressed about not being in a romantic relationship and embrace being single—a mindset in everything. Until you truly know and accept yourself, you remain stuck.
Friends
Friends are the family you can choose. It depends on whether they are good or bad friends. You want to surround yourself with people who share similar values and goals. This is harder because it requires time to build new relationships with people. It then takes time to maintain a relationship with friends.
Family
Family is a naturally built-in social connection that you have. While no family is perfect, it is often easier to have conversations with your family than to spend time getting to make a new friend.
Community
You can also find ways to get involved in your community. Community is not as fixed as friendship or family because what community means and looks like depends on each individual. For some, it may mean making some casual friends out at their favorite bar, and for others, volunteering for political campaigns or a non-profit organization and spending time at the park or gym. An individual is responsible for finding, building, and choosing their community. It is then up to them how much they want to be involved or dedicate to it.
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Negative Relationships
While there are positive relationships, you can also have negative relationships with people Here are two types of negative relationships to be aware of.
Toxic People
Toxic people can be friends, family, coworkers, or people who make you feel bad about yourself. Examples of toxic people include narcissists, drama kings or queens, and people who think they are always right. It is essential to be able to identify toxic people. You then want to remove them from your life. They only hold you back.
Related – Learn How To Remove Toxic People From Your Life Like An Expert
Superficial Friends
While friends are good to have, you need to be aware of superficial friends. Superficial friends are shallow people. They do not add any value to your life. You find yourself going out to a bar or restaurant with them only to discover yourself repeatedly having the same conversation. It gets boring. It is also a waste of time and money to stay friends with a superficial person. Superficial friends may not necessarily be toxic, but they are time wasters. Similar to toxic people, you may want to consider ending your superficial friendships.
Health
One of the ways that you can begin to feel better about yourself is to focus on your health. Here are three main ways to focus on your health.
Diet
A healthy diet is vital in helping you feel and look your best. A balanced diet helps to give your body the fuel it needs to work effectively. You will be more susceptible to illnesses if you don’t consume a well-balanced diet. There are many popular diets that you can choose from depending on your lifestyle and dietary restrictions. Here are some popular diets: carnivore, vegan, vegetarian, Keto, and the Mediterranean diet.
Exercise
Along with following a healthy diet, exercising regularly is also essential. Exercise helps you to lose weight, get the blood flowing in your body, and makes you feel better. Some ways to get exercise are to go for daily walks, ride a bike instead of driving, go on a hike, or go to the gym.
Gym
You can join a gym which will give you access to more types of weights, machines, and cardio equipment. Access to more equipment will provide you with more options and make it easier to work towards your health goal. It could be losing weight, getting fit, or building muscle. You can then consistently go to the gym to begin to work to meet your personal health goal. Going to the gym is also a good way to teach yourself self-discipline since you will start to see results for your consistency over time.
Money
Money makes the world go round. It also is needed to live. You can learn money basics before moving on to more advanced money practices. Here are four fundamental things to work on when managing and growing money.
Budget
You can begin to follow a budget. A budget helps you manage and grow your money over time. A popular budget to mind is the 50/30/20 budget. The 50/30/20 budget works by allocating fifty percent of your income to your needs, thirty percent to your wants, and twenty percent to automatically go into your savings account. Your needs include paying rent, utility bills, and groceries every month. Your wants would be going to a bar or restaurant, a subscription to an entertainment service, or buying new clothes you may want but don’t need. You then put the final twenty percent of your monthly income into your savings account to save for a rainy day or build your FU Treasure Chest.
Savings
As you begin to save money each month, you can start to build up your savings account. While a savings account doesn’t give you high-interest today, it is still a good starting point until you become more sophisticated. Once you have enough money in your savings account to cover a year’s worth of expenses, you can begin to put some of the money from your savings into a high-interest savings account, certificate of deposit, and a money market account. These are low-risk ways to earn more interest without taking on many risks.
Investing
Once you have enough money saved and invest in basic low-risk accounts, you can start to learn about investing. You can begin to learn about the stock market, cryptocurrency, and real estate and even consider starting your own business. There are different types of stocks that you can buy. Two common types are dividend-paying stocks and growth stocks. You can also consider cryptocurrency as a way to get outside the financial system. Another option is to invest in precious metals like gold, silver, and platinum as a tool for wealth preservation. You can also consider investing in real estate. Real estate is a way to generate passive income from a tenant.
The final option is to start your own business. Today you have two options when it comes to starting a business. You can have a physical business or an online business. You may have fewer risks and encounter fewer startup costs than a physical business. There are many creative ways to create income streams for an online business today. You can also make money from advertisements on websites or from a YouTube Channel. One of the great benefits of having an online business is that you can work from anywhere in the world, so you can decide to live in a less expensive country.
Develop In-Demand Skills
You can work to develop skills that are in demand. You could learn tech skills. You may want to learn a trade skill. You may even like to learn business skills to become an entrepreneur to start your own business.
Tech skills in demand are cybersecurity, data analytics, digital marketing, computer programming, and artificial intelligence. In-demand trade skills include plumbing, construction, painting, human resource specialist, and electrician. Business skills are not really able to be taught. They must be learned over time, but some of the key skills that an entrepreneur must have are being able to manage people, creative and critical thinking skills, and an understanding of finances to find ways to grow a business.
Build Up Your Net Worth
You want to always find ways to build up your net worth. In the traditional employee model, you are stuck on a fixed source of income. Your boss could fire you at any time. Today, you can discover ways to make passive income streams online. You can also work side hustles alongside a job to earn extra money. Never stop working on improving yourself. Never stop working to find ways to increase your net worth.
Financial Freedom
Financial freedom merely means living without having to worry about money. It looks different for each person. It depends on what type of lifestyle someone expects to want to live. At the bare minimum, it means not having any debt. It could mean that someone else has a mansion in an expensive state and makes seven figures a year. Today, it is easier to attain with the Internet because you can create multiple passive income streams.
Personal Development
Self-development plays a vital role in the life of singles. Without it, they remain stagnant. Here are eight ways singles can focus on personal development.
Self-Discipline
If you want to succeed in anything, you must learn self-discipline. Self-discipline is required for freedom. Consistency is the first step to being to develop self-discipline. You can then begin to build better habits, such as going to bed and waking up at a consistent time, working each day toward your goals, and becoming more organized. When you become more organized, you become more efficient.
Self-Love
Self-love means that you accept yourself and you love yourself for who you are as an individual. It is a type of love that is not often talked about. Romantic and erotic love receive the most attention from society. If you cannot love yourself, then you may never be able to be happy. You may then be unable to develop self-confidence. This may result in your having low self-esteem and self-worth.
Self-Worth
Your self-worth as a person is innate to you as an individual. However, society pressures people to get their self-worth externally from others or things like buying and having the latest gadget. When you begin to care about yourself and treat yourself better, you begin to experience your self-worth go up. You can also build up your self-worth and self-confidence by working to achieve your goals.
Self-Sufficiency
Self-sufficiency is relying on the system as little as you can. It could mean keeping the minimum amount of money in the banks. It could mean growing your food or relationships with local farmers in your area instead of always buying from a large grocery store chain. It could also look like having a few months’ supplies of emergency foods in case of an SHTF scenario. It could also mean working to build your own business so that you are no longer reliant on an employer for income.
Self-Reliance
You can also work to develop self-reliance. You can become more self-reliant by starting to pay off any debt you may have. You can find creative ways to increase your income and build multiple income streams to become financially independent. You don’t want to rely solely on a single paycheck from one employer. What happens if they decide to fire you? What happens if they choose to replace you with robots or technology? You can also become self-reliant by growing your own garden, raising your own animals, and getting to know your local farmers in your area. Another way to develop self-reliance is to be out of the financial system as much as possible by holding precious metals and cryptocurrencies.
Escape From The System
The system is working precisely as intended. It is meant to keep you down. It is designed to keep you living paycheck to paycheck. It wants you to be unhappy. It wants you to remain stuck. It creates conflict by making people fight against each other over things that don’t matter. Such as politics. What they may or may not have between their legs. The color of someone’s skin. What someone may or may not wear on their face. What someone may or may not have put into their bodies. Divide and conquer is how the system works to keep people confused and keep you from successfully reaching your goals.
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Internal Validation
Internal validation is the process of how you vindicate yourself. You prove to yourself that you can do something. When you prove to yourself that you can do something you have set as a goal for yourself. You also develop self-confidence. As you become more confident and accomplish more of your goals, you begin to improve yourself each day steadily. Rather than getting validation from others, you can get it from yourself by completing your life goals.
Think For Yourself
In a society that wants to tell you how to think from the news, entertainment, politicians, and the education system, your neighbor wants to tell you what to think. It is critical to be able to think for yourself. It just requires being able to question authority. Stand for your principles. Don’t immediately make decisions but take time to think. Don’t be afraid to question everything!
The education system does not teach you how to think because the education system, from kindergarten to higher education, is intended to indoctrinate people. It does not want critical thinkers. It is designed to create employees and citizens who do not question. The mainstream media is used to keep you in a state of fear. The entertainment industry is meant to ensure that you continue wasting your time watching meaningful entertainment instead of working to improve yourself and reach your goals.
Think for yourself. Question authority. Question everything.
Conclusion
It is up to you to change your mindset. It is up to you to stop believing the lie that society tells you that there is something wrong with being single. It is up to you to improve your relationships, health, and financial situation. You can be happy single!
Views expressed in this article are the author’s opinions and do not necessarily reflect the views of Secure Single. It is intended for informational and educational purposes only. It is not investment or financial advice. James Bollen is the author of Thriving Solo: How to Flourish and Live Your Perfect Life (Without A Soulmate). Now available in paperback and for the Kindle on Amazon. Subscribe to Secure Single’s Substack for free!
Why are people single? People may be single for a variety of reasons. One type of single is a relationship-oriented single.
What Does It Mean To Be A Relationship-Oriented Single?
A relationship-oriented single is someone who currently may be single but wants to be in a romantic relationship. This type of single places a higher priority on getting into a romantic relationship. It could be dating. It could mean eventually getting married.
Is It Bad To Be A Relationship-Oriented Single?
People may be single for many different reasons if someone wants to ultimately be in a romantic relationship, dating or getting married, instead of enjoying the single life. There is nothing wrong with that. Relationship-oriented singles place romantic relationships and romantic love higher than being single.
Where Are Relationship-Oriented Singles From?
A relationship-oriented single can be from anywhere in the world. The only requirement is for someone single to want to date and be more interested in finding a romantic partner instead of learning to enjoy being single.
When Can Someone Be A Relationship-Oriented Single?
Someone could be a relationship-oriented single if they have always wanted a romantic relationship. They could also be perpetually single, always wanting a romantic relationship but never being able to find one for whatever reason.
Who Can Be A Relationship-Oriented Single?
Both men and women can be relationship-oriented singles.
Why Would Someone Be A Relationship-Oriented Single?
They would rather be in a romantic relationship instead of be single. In some cases, they may do anything they can to stop being single. This could turn a relationship-oriented single into a serial dater until they get into a steady romantic relationship or eventually marry.
How Can A Relationship-Oriented Single Make The Most Of Being Single?
There are many ways that a relationship-oriented single can make the most of being single. Instead of always pursuing romantic relationships, they can instead start to better themselves. This will help their lives while making them more attractive to potential romantic partners. There are three main ways to focus on yourself: relationships, health, and finances.
3 Main Ways To Make The Most Of Being Single
Relationships
There are three main types of relationships that singles can work to build that are not romantic.
Friends
You don’t have to spend all of your time trying to find a romantic relationship when you are single, even if that is what you may want. When you have the right friends around you, you can surround yourself with friends who share common values and goals. They will challenge you to become a better and more interesting person. Your friends will likely have similar interests as you.
Family
You can spend it with your family. While no family is perfect, family is a natural community. You can do things with your family. It could be a weekly dinner. It could be a monthly phone or Skype call.
Community
Community is good to have, but most of the people you may know in your neighborhood may not be friends. They will more likely be acquaintances. You can find it by going to places that you enjoy going to. It could be going to restaurants, bars, the gym, or small group events at a church. You can build a community around you built around your interests and values. However, most people you know in your community will not know you as well as your friends are family.
Health
You can spend time focusing on your health. This will make you more attractive to a prospective partner. You can do simple things like exercising, going to the gym, and following a diet. When you focus on your health, you will feel better. You will also look better. This will make you more attractive to a prospective partner.
Finances
You can work to improve your financial situation. There are always ways to find ways to make extra money. You can work a side hustle. A side hustle could eventually become your main thing so you can leave your employer. Some examples of side hustles could be driving for Uber or Lyft or delivering food for UberEasts or GrubHub. You could also work to build your website and YouTube Channel.
Related – Life As A Single Woman Uber Driver [The Gig Economy Experience]
You can also transition work from your current job to a job that pays better by improving your skill set. You could learn in-demand tech skills or trade skills. It could mean taking some time to take a course online, not necessarily through a university, to learn the skills. Learning a more technical skill or a skill that is in demand that employers are willing to pay more for will help to increase what you are paid. It will also make you more competitive in the marketplace.
Conclusion
A relationship-oriented single is primarily focused on finding a romantic relationship. This is only one of many reasons why people may be single.
Views expressed in this article are the author’s opinions and do not necessarily reflect the views of Secure Single. It is intended for informational and educational purposes only. It is not investment or financial advice. James Bollen is the author of Thriving Solo: How to Flourish and Live Your Perfect Life (Without A Soulmate). Now available in paperback and for the Kindle on Amazon. Subscribe to Secure Single’s Substack for free!
Why does society make voluntary celibates feel like they are not welcome? There are negative stigmas attached to voluntary celibates, or volcels. Instead of treating people as individuals, society places people into groups to attach a stereotype to people. Voluntary celibacy is merely one of many options for why someone may be single.
What Is Voluntary Celibacy?
Voluntary celibacy is the long form of the slang word volcel. According to Urban Dictionary, “As opposed to incel, volcel is voluntarily celibate. It means that (usually) [the person] can get laid, sometimes pretty easily, but chooses instead to avoid sex.” A voluntary celibate is someone who chooses to live a celibate life without sexual relationships. It can be for only a brief period of time or for an entire lifetime. The reasons why someone may be a voluntary celibate will vary from person to person.
Where Are Voluntary Celibates From?
Anyone around the world can be a voluntary celibate. It does not matter where they live. A volcel could be your neighbor to someone living on the other side of the world.
When Can Someone Become A Voluntary Celibate?
Someone can become a voluntary celibate during any stage of life. There is no vow of celibacy required since it is informal. It is a chosen lifestyle.
How Can Someone Make The Most Of Being A Voluntary Celibate?
A voluntary celibate can make the most of their volceldom by focusing on themselves. They can hone their strengths, skills, and abilities. Instead of seeking external validation through romantic relationships, here are three primary ways how voluntary celibates can begin to focus on themselves.
Health
The first way is to focus on personal health. You can exercise daily. Follow a diet that works for your health needs. Go to the gym a few times a week or every day. It will depend on your health goals.
You can go for daily walks. You can choose from a range of diets that may work best for you, from the carnivore diet, vegetarian diet, vegan diet, Mediterranean diet, or the DASH diet. You can also go to the gym to work to lose weight or to gain muscle. When you integrate regular exercise, working out, and following a diet, you will begin to see your health slowly improve.
Relationships
The second way is to develop friendships. You can make friends with people who share similar interests and values as you. You can use a website like Meetup to easily meet people who share your interests and values. You can find ways to be involved in your community. It could even be something as simple as having a conversation with someone at a bar or restaurant. It is up to you to decide who your friends are and whom you want to surround yourself with.
Money
The final way is to work to generate income. You can work a regular job, but after that job, you can work a side hustle to bring in more income. Depending on your financial goals, that side hustle could become your main thing allowing you to leave your job. Some examples of side hustles include freelancing, starting a YouTube Channel, working on building a website, or finding other creative ways to build income streams.
Once you have enough income coming in from what is now your main thing, you could make it into an online business. You can then reinvest your money into another business or in other investments like real estate, the stock market, precious metals, cryptocurrencies, land, or buying a second passport or residency in another country. You want to diversify your investments, but the investment which will give you the highest return on investment is owning your own business.
Conclusion
Voluntary celibates, or volcels, get a bad rep from society. There is nothing wrong with being a voluntary celibate despite the negative stigmas that are attached to it. No matter why you may be single, it is important to acknowledge that people may be single for a variety of reasons. One of those reasons may be because someone is a voluntary celibate.
12 Ways Popular Culture Idealizes Marriage
Are you curious about how society idolizes marriage? No matter why you may be single, you can thrive as a single person. You can make the most of being single. Here are twelve ways popular culture idealizes marriage.
12 Ways Popular Culture Idealizes Marriage
The One
Popular culture spreads the myth that every person has a soulmate. A soulmate is someone you are meant to be with, no matter what. This myth is perpetuated through fairy tales, Disney movies, and the dating industrial complex. Soulmates do not exist.
There is no “one” person for you. You are the only person you need.
True Love
Popular culture also pushes the concept of true love. This follows from the soulmate myth. The idea of true love is that you can only love one person. The reality is that you may be compatible with multiple people. You can think of The Prince Bride, among other cultural concepts, of pushing true love.
Prince Charming
There is then the myth of Prince Charming. Prince Charming rescues the princess or damsel in distress from the monster that has captured her. She will then marry her Prince Charming.
The whole concept of Prince Charming is ludicrous. Every man has his flaws. There is no perfect person, yet society wants you to believe that there is someone who will come to rescue you.
There is no one coming to save you. Be it Prince Charming or someone else. You are responsible for rescuing yourself from your current situation.
Damsel In Distress
The damsel in distress is a woman who often has been taken by a villain. She is distressed because she is living in a tower or imprisoned. She is a captive to the villain or monster that has captured her.
The damsel in distress must wait for Prince Charming to rescue her. The problem with this is that it makes women weak. It makes women think there is a Prince Charming. It also makes people think they must wait for someone to rescue them rather than take action to free themselves from their situation.
No matter your circumstances, you can practice self-responsibility and work to improve your situation.
Princess
The princess is another familiar archetype in Disney movies and fairy tales. She often wishes for her Prince Charming to rescue her from her singleness. She does not want to be a princess. She wants to be a queen sitting beside her queen.
The problem is to be a queen, she must marry. You can live an extraordinary life without getting married.
Wedding Dress
The wedding dress has long been associated with purity—a virgin bride. As a result of the hookup culture, hookup apps, and the normalization of hooking up, this is no longer the case. Someone you may marry may not be pure, let alone a virgin. Yet a bride can wear the dress on the day of the wedding.
It does not matter why you decide to marry someone, but the traditional concept of what the wedding dress symbolizes continues to become more archaic. That is a consequence of what popular culture has deemed acceptable behavior. It does not matter who is wearing the dress as long as you love the person, yet the wedding dress has long been a vital symbol to showcase a woman’s purity to her husband on her wedding night.
Find A Beautiful Bride
Prince Charming is told that he must find a beautiful bride. This results in two main problems. Men start to succumb to unrealistic beauty standards. Men want every woman to be a supermodel or at least a seven to a ten.
For women, they must do everything that they can to present themselves unrealistically to men. This requires women to buy makeup, get boob jobs, and other things which they believe will make them more beautiful.
Society’s emphasis on beauty is problematic. While caring about one’s appearance is worthwhile, it can be taken overboard. You no longer are doing it for yourself. You are doing it to please other people, Big Beauty and Big Wedding, to get a date or to get married.
It is best to be true to yourself. You could save and invest that money rather than spend it on beauty and other temporary products.
Proposal
Engagements and proposals are another major event. People are told to celebrate when someone is proposed to. It does not matter if it is a friend or a celebrity.
They were proposed to, so you must be happy. You must celebrate them by liking their proposal and engagement posts on social media.
Wedding
Weddings are celebrated as one-in-a-lifetime events. Never mind that divorces are becoming more common. Yet you are told to celebrate the bride and the groom’s wedding.
You are encouraged to plan your schedule around two people you may never see again after their wedding day. They may not be together a couple to a few years after attending their wedding. Weddings have become expensive, overrated, and not worth the time and money to attend.
Marriage
Marriage continues to decline in popularity. What is the point of committing yourself to another person when you could enjoy life alone? What about the risks that come with divorce?
Modern society has made it so that it is best not to marry. This is fine because you can live an extraordinary life as a single person.
White Picket Fence
Once you are married, you are told to build a white picket fence around your house. You then are advised to have two-and-a-half children. It does not matter if you can afford your house or the children.
You must reproduce. Your needs do not matter. You must care more about reproducing than caring for your own needs.
Happily Ever After
Happily ever after is another myth that society pushes onto singles. It follows from the belief in finding your soulmate, marriage, and the white picket fence. You are told to find the right person, purchase the right house, then have children. You will then be happy.
You do not need to marry to be happy. You can be happily single. You can enjoy a single life. You can live your best life without marriage, yet popular culture tells you that is impossible.
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Summary
Popular culture pushes many myths upon singles, from soulmates to marriage being the only way to happiness. The reality is that you can invest in yourself to reach your full potential. It is best to invest in yourself rather than focus on others. Whether you want to date or marry eventually, focus on yourself and work to reach your goals instead of placing dating and marriage on a pedestal.
Views expressed in this article are opinions of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of Secure Single. James Bollen is the author of Thriving Solo: How to Flourish and Live Your Perfect Life (Without A Soulmate). Now available in paperback on Amazon. Subscribe to Secure Single’s Substack for free!