I believe it’s important to take care of your curiosities and bucket list items as a single before opening up a new chapter as a person in a committed relationship. It has been said many times that you have more autonomy and freedom as a single person, than you do in a relationship with compromise. You may have heard about the horror stories of people who got too serious too fast in a relationship and ended up imploding their own by suppressing their curiosities that a person may have never fulfilled before entering into a committed relationship. As an anecdote to cheating, risky behavior, or downright dangerous acts, relieving yourself of these five things may be just the key to saving yourself from heartache should you enter a committed relationship. So with that in mind, let’s break down the five most important things to do before you get into a committed relationship. Here are five life experiences singles should have before a relationship.

5 Life Experiences Singles Should Have Before A Relationship


This goes without saying, but I will say it anyway: see as much of the world before you go and settle down. The true you can travel the world with your S.O., but it can be a lot more difficult when you have a family. Travel. See places you have never seen before. Go and find adventure out in the world. Talk to other people who also travel and visit exotic places in packs. You will be more well-rounded and live a richer and fuller life.

Work Your Ass Off

Yes, you should definitely do this.  You have more free time now than you ever imagined right now as a single. Work your ass off now to set the future for your 30’s and 40’s. It may seem like a long time away, but the time will come when you reach those age groups. Work your ass off now to save money, make money, and also take EXTREMELY good care of your body. It is the only house you have to live in. When You work your ass off, you build a good work ethic. An extremely handy skill that all intelligent business owners will revere.

Hook Up With That Person You Think Is Hot

See that hot guy or girl across the room? Secretly you want to hook up with them, get their number, or have an engaging conversation with them. Don’t be shy. You could have the opportunity of a lifetime in front of you and feel fulfilled if you go over and talk with them. It may even be a friend that deemed you ‘friend-zoned’. Give it your all — life is seriously too short to go about being too scared to try anything. If it turns out to be a simple ‘no’ from the receiving end, you will at least know that you explored the opportunity and increased your odds because you asked. If you get a ‘yes!’, lady luck is on your side – only because you had the courage to get out there and try. Go for it!!

Adore Friends Babies, Hand Them Back

Some of us want kids, and some of us don’t. That’s quite alright. But that doesn’t stop you from adoring your new baby nephew or supporting your best friend with a new baby girl. The matter of the fact is that the baby is not your responsibility – yay! Good news for you: you can be supportive, show your adoration and appreciation for new life, and hand it back shortly after coddling the newborn. Wa-la! You are now free to go about your business. Breathe because you are still free.

Discover The REAL You!

Too often in life, I feel that people live their daily lives without connecting deeply with others, simply because they do not know enough about themselves. Take this time while you are single to FIX yourself, find yourself, nurture yourself, and link the wounds from the mistakes you made earlier on. The good news about being single is that you have so much time to yourself to learn about yourself. I have made countless mistakes in society and learned a lot. I wouldn’t take back any lesson learned for anything, as each stupid mistake I have made has taught me about the world and how I relate to myself. Discover the real you. Learn how you bleed, show your true colors, and be proud of it. Your vibe will eventually attract your tribe. So stand up, dust yourself off, and be the beautiful, strong, passionate, wonderful person you were made to be. And remember, to human is to err.

Satisfy your hunger beforehand, and you will lead a more fulfilled, and perhaps have some better stories to tell your S.O. if or when the time comes. For now, signing out. Stay secure, singles!


Views expressed in this article are the author’s opinions and do not necessarily reflect the views of Secure Single. It is intended for informational and educational purposes only. It is not investment or financial advice. James Bollen is the author of Thriving Solo: How to Flourish and Live Your Perfect Life (Without A Soulmate). Now available in paperback and for the Kindle on Amazon. Subscribe to Secure Single’s Substack for free!
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Danielle has chosen to be single in her walk of life. She experienced dating in her late teens and early twenties, and had always felt each relationship was unfulfilling. To find more meaning in her life, she broke off to go down a path of self-discovery.
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