Reasons Not Been in Relationship

Dear Secure Singles,

Since the website has grown because people need a positive message about the single life, it is time that I tell readers more about who I am as a single. I am a 26-year old man who has never been in a romantic relationship. I did try online and speed dating once, but a romantic relationship never came from it. I enjoy being single. Society pressures people to seek out relationships when they are not ready or do not want one as part of the dating industrial complex. Here are five reasons why I am content being single and I have never been in a romantic relationship.


My primary goal is graduate with my Master’s in Information Assurance with a Cybersecurity Specialization from Regis University. Cybersecurity is a field that is in high demand and I can continue to develop skills following graduation. I also believe in lifelong education and that continual learning is the optimal way to become the best in the field. This requires time, commitment, and determination to become someone who is knowledgeable in a certain field. A romantic relationship should take time away from my education and my other aspirations.

Career Goals

I want to help solve society’s problems from helping to change society to be more acceptant of singles to one day having my own companies. I am an entrepreneur at heart. Entrepreneurs have a different mindset than most people who are happy to work regular jobs. The cost is time, building connections for future projects, and finding talent to make Secure Single the premiere site for singles to learn the values of the single life.


There are 168 hours in a week If the recommended eight hours of sleep a night is followed, that is 56 hours of the week gone. That leaves only 112 hours left in the week to work on things that I am passionate about and care about with my time. Time is a resource that cannot be taken back. Because that is true; I spend my time on school, work, Secure Single, and working to become the best single person that I can be.

Relationship Restraints

Romantic relationships restrain people by making them spend more time with the person they are dating or living with. Once they marry the person, they commit to their partner and become part of their family. For men, this most commonly means that they move to where their wife’s family is or nearby. Men spend time with their wife’s family and lose touch with their family and friends after they are get married. All the things that are part of a romantic relationship and that follow take my time and commitment from things that are more important to me. Romantic relationships are not bad and those who are single by circumstance should enjoy being single until they are ready for all that a romantic relationship requires.

Values of the Single Life

The values of the single life are security, diversity, autonomy, and flexibility. Security means that singles should be comfortable being single since human value does not come from romantic relationships. There is diversity among singles for the reasons why people are single. However, while they may have different reasons for being single, they are united by their singlehood and singleness. The single life offers complete autonomy for singles to direct their own lives and destiny without being restrained or redirected by a romantic partner. Flexibility means singles are responsible for the choices and opportunities that the single life provides and choosing what they want to do with life’s choices and opportunities. These are the Core Values of Secure Single and the values that I embrace as a fellow single.

Securely Single,

Founder and President, James Bollen

Secure Single provides a forum for a diverse variety of perspectives, ideas, experiences, and resources and does not take official stances. All writers speak exclusively for themselves. Concurrently, any quotes, shares, reposts, interviews, etc. do not imply endorsement by Secure Single LLC or its curators. Now go live your best single life!
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James Bollen is the Founder and President of Secure Single. He is an entrepreneur and a content creator with the goal of helping all different types of singles to learn to thrive as a single person.
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