Too often people rush to get married. When pressured by society, we often find the first person we can get our hands on to marry. This is a recipe for disaster, not to mention that rushing can cause you to attract the wrong partner. Here are the six main reasons why singles often regret getting married and why singles should stop believing that they need a partner to be happy.
The sages tell us that if we go about our lives, then ‘someone’ will come to us and be Mr. or Mrs. Right. I’ve seen it happen for some people, but I have also seen it happen where others attract someone who is completely uncomplimentary to them. The need to find Mr. or Mrs. Right is also reinforced to us by society’s belief in the soul mate myth.
Here are six of the top reasons people regret getting married:
The desire to hook up with other people
Some people just settle, without sowing their wild oats, and this can be a disaster. Suppressed urges eventually come out, and sometimes in the worst way. Save yourself and your partner the trouble of heartbreak, and just go experience life before you become committed. You can always enjoy life once you get into a serious relationship, but take care of your bucket list items first.
The person they married is not who they thought they were
Sometimes when people are trying their best to attract a partner, they put on masks and are not their true authentic selves. Once the partner is attained, the person reverts back to the original person they once were. This Can be traumatic for the one they married because they married you for who they thought you were. That person turned out to be a lie.
Having Children Too Soon
Once you’ve popped them out, there is really no going back. If you’re not already on a solid foundation, having children can add salt to the wound. Yes children are beautiful, but when you’re not solid in your relationship, it an be the solution to tear you and your partner apart. Most people buckle under pressure.
Not Having as Much Sex as You Thought You Would
People Get married and like the idea of sex with one partner who is safe, but sometimes when you get married you have less sex. When your needs aren’t met, you will seek them elsewhere. That is the essence and foundation of cheating.
A simple act of kindness or ‘thank you’ goes a long way. You or your partner may not feel appreciated, or they may feel like you’ve taken advantage of them, or they take advantage of you. Behavior like this is cause for abandonment.
Not Having Clear Intentions
When you don’t know the motives of the other side, and every person has a motive for something, then communication down the road can be problematic. When you are upfront and honest, you can help set the tone for an open and safe environment for the other person to be open and honest.
Basically, if you follow a few simple rules you should be set when it comes to staying securely single, or avoiding heartbreak trauma while in a committed relationship. Don’t get married if you are not 100% sure it is what you want regardless of what society tells us. Wait until you feel ready. Be clear on your intentions, open, and honest. Make sure to experience your single life to the fullest extent, and have fun, because when you don’t get married, you now share your life and make decisions with another person’s consideration.
Stay safe, stay happily single, and enjoy life. Love is a battlefield, so don’t commit to anything you’re not comfortable with – especially a commitment like marriage. Good luck out there!
Danielle E. Brockman is a contributing writer for Secure Single LLC.
Secure Single provides a forum for a diverse variety of perspectives, ideas, experiences, and resources and does not take official stances. All writers speak exclusively for themselves. Concurrently, any quotes, shares, reposts, interviews, etc. do not imply endorsement by Secure Single LLC or its curators. Now go live your best single life!