dating in your 40s couple in bed with newspaper

Dating in your 40s to some women might seem like utter torture, especially if you’ve been dating for what seems like an eternity and still want to get married.

There are 6 things you can do while dating in your 40s that will make still being single much more enjoyable.

Be grateful for your experience. Thankfully you’re not in your 20s anymore. Remember what that was like 15-20 years ago? Talk about confusing times.

I know when I was in my 20s I was a hot mess. I couldn’t even write a full paragraph that made any sense. Seriously. My brain was a jumbled mess of men’s telephone numbers and faces, that I couldn’t remember.

When I was dating in my 20s I never even had one actual “date.” There was no dinner and certainly no movie. The thing to do was get a 6-pack of beer and sit on the raggedy couch on the front porch, or go to a party. “Hanging out was the extent of my “dating life.”

So glad the times have changed. Not only do you get to have great dates when your dating in your 30s or 40s. There’s more!

Dating in Your 30s and 40s: 6 Things You Should Know

dating in your 40s couple in bed with newspaper

Men are even closer to your level when you’re dating in your 40s.

Yes, women are generally more connected to their emotions and maybe more mature than men, but most men that you will meet for a date now will have had as much life experience as you.

The men you’re meeting are already successful in their careers, probably has some money in the bank and will even pick up the check.

Imagine this happening in your younger days. Kids in college don’t have much money, and if they did, they were spending it on ramen noodles and beer— Not on you. Aren’t you glad that a date today in real life means an actual date? You know, one that takes place at a restaurant, wine bar or coffee shop?

I got together with a guy I “dated” 20 years earlier. We had great conversations. He asked me, “Why didn’t we talk about this kind of stuff when we were dating in college?” I said something like, “Because we were twenty!”

We all get better with age, and smarter.

Dating in your 30s or even dating in your 40s is much more refined than when you’re in your 20s.

Men are smarter (hopefully) and if you have a good profile online somewhere— You’ll have a slew of eligible bachelors lining up to take you out on a date and potentially get married. You do have to weed through them, and it might take some time.

dating in your 40s gavel with heart

Enjoy your time alone and be thankful that you’re not in the middle of a nasty divorce.

And if you’ve been divorced and are over 40s darting, according to the Journal “American Law and Economics Review” studies are showing that women are happier after their divorce

Women report relief after their divorce— It was undoubtedly a tremendous relief for me. It took me a while to become totally happy with my life, but if I’m about 100 times happier now that the crazy relationship and divorce storm is over. I couldn’t be more thrilled about being single.

And along with what else makes me happy . . .

Smartphones make life easier for us women dating in their 30s and 40s.

Because in online dating over 40— You are the prize.

You may not realize this yet, but you are the big Kahuna. Men want to be with you. You might still be single because you haven’t met someone that is up to your standards yet. Thankfully since you’re more mature, now than back then, you’ve gotten a little wiser. Another thing is—

Divorced men are often likely to marry again— And they are plentiful.

One of the reasons, according to Huffington post’s Emily V Gordon, may be that a lot of breakup support is geared toward women, and not so much for men. There isn’t much info out there for men to “heal their heart” and grow from their dark night of the soul experience that is divorce. And they look for another woman.

A rebound isn’t a bad thing, and neither is dating. You just need to have the right mindset and give yourself permission to have fun in the process.

Lots of Love,

Dina Colada


Dina Colada is a contributing author at Secure Single LLC. You can connect with her at for loads of dating advice and profile makeovers or on Instagram.


Secure Single provides a forum for a diverse variety of perspectives, ideas, experiences, and resources and does not take official stances. All writers speak exclusively for themselves. Concurrently, any quotes, shares, reposts, interviews, etc. do not imply endorsement by Secure Single LLC or its curators. Now go live your best single life!
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Dina has been mostly single for much of her adult life with lots of dating in between some short, yet growth-centered relationships. She has devoted most of her time to helping singles thrive while on the path to love. She is multi-passionate and loves to connect with other entrepreneurs— Especially ones that are single!
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