There are tons of ways to learn how to be a happy single woman.

I’m not going to bore you with the same old same old how to be a happy single woman. Oh no. I’m going to share with you the things that have worked for me and the happy Danes. I’ve been mostly single and happy for a while. Although all Danish people aren’t single, they are, however, happy. 

There used to be a thing that everyone thought. It was coined by Malcolm Gladwell, (I’m in love with his brain by the way). His principle was that it takes 10,000 hours to master something. Be it sports, education, or even being single (I added that one myself!).

Some of us have spent more than enough time to master singledom according to that number, no problemo. But maybe you’re new to this way of the single woman living and you’re not sure how to master not dating and being single

Thankfully, according to a new Princeton Study, smarty pants, Malcolm’s theory got pretty much crushed. (Sorry Gladwell, I still love you). Researchers did a meta-analysis of deliberate practices in 88 different studies.

Maybe you don’t have to practice how to be a happy single women for that ginormous integer of time, after all. 

Mastery of the single life can come much more quickly.

What it does take to be a happy single woman is to have deliberate intentions to be happy. 

Your focused intentions can change the perception of the world inside you and of your surroundings. You get to decide that your happiness is of utmost importance.

Maybe the Beatles would have been great if they had only practiced for 5000 hours. However, we’ll never know. But they did practice and you can practice happiness.

I know one thing that rings true. Practice makes perfect. Learn from other happy people— And don’t hate on yourself when you don’t feel like the happiest of the happy.  You also don’t need to be with a man or even have one on the horizon.

You don’t have to be dating to know how to be a happy single woman.

Looking at men on tinder isn’t the only thing in your life. You can stop swiping and learn a thing or two from the Danish population.

According to BBC News, Michael Booth, the author of “The Almost Nearly Perfect People: Behind The Myth Of The Scandinavian Utopia”, questioned many Danish people about their happiness.

He believes part of their happiness is due to them setting their expectations low. 

Lower those expectations in yourself, girl. You can’t do everything perfectly— Neither can anyone else.

So when you’re single don’t feel bad if you don’t feel like a million bucks every second of every day.

Give yourself fewer goals of trying to be perfect. Make of your intentions to do well, and if it’s not perfect that’s OK with me. 

If you want to know how to be a happy single woman: Give yourself a break.

I know it’s easy to beat yourself up for the things you think you’ve done wrong.

Certainly, we all do it— Unless you’re a narcissist in complete denial for ever doing anything wrong, ever.

You can think about the things you didn’t accomplish— Or you can decide to be nice to yourself one more time. Just keep doing that. One thing at a time. 

Pat yourself on the back for not burning the lasagne. And hey! You’ve flossed every single day for the past month. Yeah!

Lower your expectations of the things you can accomplish in 8 hours. You’re not superhuman. 

Talk nicely to yourself and if you fall brush off your pants and pretend it never happened. 

If you spill your coffee on your white blouse or the lady at the grocery store is rude and it makes you upset— That’s OK. You’re human and perfectly imperfect, just like everyone else.

Lots of Love,

Dina Colada

Views expressed in this article are the author’s opinions and do not necessarily reflect the views of Secure Single. It is intended for informational and educational purposes only. It is not investment or financial advice. James Bollen is the author of Thriving Solo: How to Flourish and Live Your Perfect Life (Without A Soulmate). Now available in paperback and for the Kindle on Amazon. Subscribe to Secure Single’s Substack for free!
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ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Dina has been mostly single for much of her adult life with lots of dating in between some short, yet growth-centered relationships. She has devoted most of her time to helping singles thrive while on the path to love. She is multi-passionate and loves to connect with other entrepreneurs— Especially ones that are single!
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