Single Tattooed Dad

“Don’t you think it’s better if married couples foster and not single people?”

Probably the most common question I get when people find out I’m in the process of getting licensed as a foster parent. I’m very well aware of the stereotypes and I hit a lot of them. I’m a man, I’m 30, I have a full sleeve of tattoos and I have been known to dress to the beat of my own drum. I’m not exactly the poster child for babysitters…

And I agree, it’s better for married couples to foster than for single people. Kids need two parents. But there’s a flaw in this approach. There are roughly 50 million married Christians in America. There are 428,000 kids in the foster system. That means if only .00856% of Christian couples decided to foster we’d no longer have a system.

I’m fostering because not even .00856% of Christians are willing to foster.

That sentence sucks to say and could be the one sentence that prevents the entire world from sharing this article. But there is clearly a gap in the system and I’ve been called to fill it, even if I am a single, tatted, 30-year-old. God can use anyone, can’t he?

Single Tattooed Dad

So because there’s still hundreds of thousands of kids in the system I’m going to try and help in whatever way I can. I’m very human. I definitely always thought about it like, “One day, when I’m married, I’ll foster.” I wasn’t even thinking about having kids in my home until I said, “I do.” I even had a friend say that’s the way God designed it.

Then I woke up.

It must have been two years ago. I woke up and realized a discrepancy in my logic. God didn’t biblically call me to get married, but He did biblically call me to care for the orphans and the widows. Period.

This is when my view started to shift. God gave me an order. Not because He’s a dictator but because He’s a loving father who knows I’ll find my purpose in life through kids, not money or promotions.

He didn’t say, “Hey, care about kids, but only if it’s convenient and makes sense to culture.” He straight up said care for the orphans. Following God is an adventure and by definition my adventure has lived miles off of the well-beaten path and I wouldn’t have it any other way.

Single Tattooed Dad 2

I’m not fostering because I’m going to make a perfect foster parent. I’m not fostering because I’m a “good Christian” or anything like that. I’m going to fail, I’m going to make mistakes, and yes, a married couple would be better, but one thing I’ll never do is fail to try.

Originally written by Lairs Johnston. Article reposted with permission from  Save The Storks.
Secure Single provides a forum for a diverse variety of perspectives, ideas, experiences, and resources and does not take official stances. All writers speak exclusively for themselves. Concurrently, any quotes, shares, reposts, interviews, etc. do not imply endorsement by Secure Single LLC or its curators. Now go live your best single life!


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James Bollen is the Founder and President of Secure Single. He is an entrepreneur and a content creator with the goal of helping all different types of singles to learn to thrive as a single person.
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