Are you tired of always hearing that you must find your soulmate to be happy? These are nine life-changing ways to level up your life instead of chasing romantic love.

9 Life-Changing Ways To Love Up Instead Of Chasing Romantic Love

Take Ownership Of Your Life

While society advocates for looking up to leaders, embracing self-responsibility is the key to true progress and personal growth. It is not about blindly following but about taking the reins of your life and steering it towards your goals.

Focus on taking ownership of your life. You do not need to pursue a romantic partner. Self-responsibility is the key to achieving your goals.

No one will come to save you. Self-ownership is the key to reaching your full potential. Don’t let romantic relationships distract you from becoming the person you envision throughout your life.

Discover Your Obsession

Discover your obsession. Why waste your precious time obsessing over someone when you can channel that energy into something that enriches your life?

Continuously improve your skills and seek opportunities to monetize your obsession.

People may come and go, but your true passion can bring enduring fulfillment. Take charge of your life, or settle for a life of conformity.

Refine Your Skills

Refine your skills. What sets you apart? Your innate abilities will align with your obsession. Envision turning your talents into a lucrative career or a profitable business.

Keep refining your core skills and acquiring complementary ones linked to your passion. Today, you can gain knowledge through free online resources and videos. Once you identify your true obsession, consider investing in a digital course or pursuing a certification.


Embracing self-education is the key to unlocking your success. Self-learning surpasses the value of a college degree. If learning halts after graduation, stagnation follows.

Self-learning is imperative for personal success. It is a vital habit of many self-made millionaires.

Would you rather read a dry college book or deeply dive into topics you obsess over?


Regular physical activity, such as exercise and team sports, improves focus, leading to greater success. Team sports demand quick decision-making, sharpening your focus. Consistent moderate exercise like cycling or brisk walking can significantly improve concentration.

Enhanced concentration can boost your productivity, ultimately aiding you in achieving your goals.

Increase Your Income

It is essential to consider the following to understand why you must increase your income:

  • Has the economy improved over the past few years?
  • Have you received a raise that kept up with inflation?
  • If not, it’s crucial to explore ways to increase your income.

For instance, you could learn a new skill for a higher-paying job, invest in the stock market, or start your own business.

An obsession with writing has driven my journey. My primary strategy for increasing my income revolves around my business, particularly self-publishing books on Amazon. I’ve also discovered various ways to monetize my website, such as ads and paid subscriptions. My website and self-publishing allow me to reinvest in other types of assets.

Remember, the Internet is a vast landscape of income opportunities waiting for you to explore. It’s not just about boosting your income but also about considering the potential of leaving your current job and venturing into entrepreneurship. With enough income, this could be a viable and empowering option, opening a world of possibilities.

Begin A Side Hustle

You could start a side hustle to bring in extra income. There are numerous opportunities to choose from, such as:

  •  Landscaping
  • Lawn mowing
  • Photography
  • Graphic design
  • Video editing
  • Blogging
  • Digital marketing
  • Starting a newsletter
  • Beginning a YouTube or TikTok channel
  • Working as a virtual assistant.

If you aspire to transform your side hustle into a business, it’s crucial to approach it with a business mindset. Treat it as a business, not a hobby.

When I first started Secure Single, I treated it like a hobby because I thought success only came from being an employee. Since everyone I knew was an employee, I had no business owner mentors to look up to.

Start A Business

In the business world, the goal is to turn a profit by providing products and services to customers. When venturing into entrepreneurship, there are various paths to consider:

  • Establishing a trade-focused enterprise (such as carpentry or HVAC services)
  • Pursuing freelance or contract opportunities to generate income
  • Creating compelling content across social media platforms to build an audience and have potential customers to sell to down your sales funnel
  • Running advertisements on a website or medium to generate revenue
  • Offering exclusive paid subscriptions on a dedicated website or service such as Substack
  • Diving into e-commerce by selling merchandise, digital courses, or e-books

Owning a business allows for endless creativity and the opportunity to explore new income streams. Although challenges are inevitable, they provide valuable lessons for growth. As a solopreneur, it’s essential to learn from mistakes and work towards building a supportive team around you so that it is no longer only you. 

Solution Oriented Mindset

Embracing a solution-oriented mindset sets you apart. You can offer impactful solutions to make a difference in people’s lives, especially in a business setting.

You can achieve this by offering advice based on your experiences, creating and selling a product that solves customers’ problems, or providing a service that addresses common issues people want to resolve.

What can you offer to the world? What have you always wanted to do but allowed friends or family to hold you back from doing it?

Discover a simple solution to a problem and help others while potentially making money.


These are nine strategies to improve your life instead of chasing romantic love. Focus on self-improvement rather than pursuing romantic love. Invest in yourself, increase your income, and continually work on enhancing your skillset.

The views expressed in this article are the author’s opinions and do not necessarily reflect the views of Secure Single. It is intended for informational and educational purposes only and is not investment, financial, or legal advice. Consult with a financial or legal professional before making investment or legal decisions. James Bollen is the author of Thriving Solo: How to Flourish and Live Your Perfect Life (Without A Soulmate). It is now available in paperback and Kindle on Amazon. 
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James Bollen is the Founder and President of Secure Single. He is an entrepreneur and a content creator with the goal of helping all different types of singles to learn to thrive as a single person.
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