Divorce is a difficult experience to go through; but if you are recently divorced, you are not alone. The divorce rate in the United States, and other developed countries, is around 50% with people in their early twenties having the highest rate of divorce. Divorce is more common than people may realize in a society that wants couples to date and to get married. Since you are single again, here are three ways to move on after a divorce and to improve your own life as a new single.

Mental Survivor

The women that move on successfully don’t make being a divorcee their identity. They are able to move on. They are able to recognize that whatever their partner did that led to divorce was the cause of the divorce. This creates the mental freedom to know that you are a not a victim. Set an expiration date for feeling sorry for yourself and being the victim, then move forward with a strong and clear mental mindset.

     Mantra, “I cannot change my ex. I can only change me.”

Repeat this mantra whenever you ex acts or says something unpleasant towards you or your children. This is especially true when it comes to custody battles over children. Control your inner self and let that control be displayed on the outside while dealing with the complexities and issues following a divorce.

     Learn to Love Yourself

This is one of the most difficult things to learn and to accept in life. You know all your flaws. You know all your struggles. You know all your issues. Despite that, it is important to examine yourself and to learn to appreciate yourself for all your successes. Focus on your life goals, not your ex. Determine your priorities, instead of focusing on your problems. Learn to love yourself and figure out what is meaningful to you in your own life. Divorce is an opportunity for you to further mature, to grow, and to know oneself. Take advantage of this new chance that divorce has given to you.

Views expressed in this article are the author’s opinions and do not necessarily reflect the views of Secure Single. It is intended for informational and educational purposes only. It is not investment or financial advice. James Bollen is the author of Thriving Solo: How to Flourish and Live Your Perfect Life (Without A Soulmate). Now available in paperback and for the Kindle on Amazon. Subscribe to Secure Single’s Substack for free!
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James Bollen is the Founder and President of Secure Single. He is an entrepreneur and a content creator with the goal of helping all different types of singles to learn to thrive as a single person.
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