Are you unable to get your past significant other out of your mind? Stop obsessing over someone to transform your life!

Stop Obsessing Over Someone: Transform Your Life

What Is An Obsession?

An obsession is when you think about someone or something all the time.

Obsessing over someone or something can be unhealthy and unproductive. Redirecting your focus to a more constructive task or activity can help you break free from this cycle.

Problem With Obsessing Over Someone

Who is the person you are fixating on?

A girlfriend. A boyfriend. A crush. A lover. A deceased spouse.

If you’re still trapped in the past, obsessing over someone who is no longer part of your life, it is high time to liberate yourself. 

This obsession is not just a hindrance. It is a roadblock to your personal growth and a barrier to your happiness. It is time to prioritize yourself and forge ahead.

Problem With Obsessing Over Things

The danger of fixating on possessions is that they need space. Too many possessions can lead to hoarding or excessive consumption. A larger living space allows for more storage, but instead of wasting money on unnecessary items, consider saving and investing.

You risk becoming a hoarder if you connect your self-worth to material things. Constant consumption pressures you to chase trends and keep up with others. There’s no need to have the latest fashion or tech. Competing with others is unnecessary.

The people you admire might be in debt, putting on a facade of affording a lifestyle they can’t sustain. Instead of striving to keep up with them, redirect your focus on your own journey. Pursuing self-improvement is a more fulfilling path, as genuine happiness doesn’t stem from possessions, but from within.

Learn to enjoy and live life at your own pace. 

Transform Your Life By Discovering Your True Obsession

Why not embark on a journey to uncover your true obsession? What if you devoted yourself to the activities you have always loved? Imagine focusing on acquiring new skills and elevating yourself. What could you achieve with this investment in self-improvement?

The decision to remain stagnant or transform your life is in your hands. It is up to you if you will continue to ignore your true obsession. The consequence could be getting stuck doing something you hate for the rest of your life.

For me, that has meant working retail jobs rather than finding ways to make money publishing books. I self-published my first book and am now preparing to self-publish more. 

Society wants you to believe you cannot do what you truly enjoy. You likely can, but you must be pragmatic and resourceful to make it a reality. 

Strive to distinguish yourself from the crowd. Cultivate positive daily habits to enhance yourself each day.

Allocate time to transition your passion from a hobby or side project into a business. If you desire to do so, allocate your resources to make it a reality.

Will you persist in treating your true passion, which has the potential to enhance your life, as a mere hobby? Or are you ready to explore avenues to monetize it? The choice is yours.


Stop wasting your energy chasing romantic love. Obsessing over someone is a distraction from your goals and productivity. Instead, channel that energy into investing in your true skills and interests. Take a transformative journey to pursue work that truly excites you and that you are willing to dedicate yourself to for the long haul.

James Bollen is the author of Thriving Solo: How to Flourish and Live Your Perfect Life (Without A Soulmate). It is now available in paperback and Kindle on Amazon. 
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James Bollen is the Founder and President of Secure Single. He is an entrepreneur and a content creator with the goal of helping all different types of singles to learn to thrive as a single person.
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