Marriage is idealized and has become an idol by people and by society. This is seen with the cuffing and engagement seasons. For those who are single by circumstance, be aware of the ten ways that culture idealizes and fetishizes marriage.
Society’s Top Ten Fairy Tale Marriage Fetishes
The idea of The One is a fantasy that there is a perfect person out there for you. This ideal works nicely for Hollywood and romantic comedies because there is always a happy end at the end of the film. Real life is more complicated, relationships are messy, and this belief will hurt future romantic relationships.
True love means perfect romance. Utter perfection. Romantic love is divine. It is the goal of people to find true love to complete themselves. Only The One can do this. Do you live in The Matrix or in fairy tales? We didn’t think so either.
For women, you are told to wait to meet their Prince Charming by Hollywood and by the media. Their handsome prince will rescue them from being single, be your true love, and then they will finally get their happily ever after.
Finding a Beautiful Bride (Damsel in Distress)
For men or Prince Charming, you must find and rescue your beautiful blushing bride to be from whatever monsters in their life they may be facing before they ride off together into the sunset for their happily ever after.
The proposal is a cultural practice to show the person that you intend to marry by making a memorable and a big show for the announcement.
The bride’s dress is meant to celebrate that one life milestone and the dress being white was traditionally used to symbolize purity. It is a must-have because society and the wedding industry requires it because it is what every woman has dreamed about since birth.
Weddings are meant to be big events to celebrate the newly married couple, their new life, and the Paramount of marriage. The big display places pressures on singles to get married as well with the bridal bouquet toss caught by the next person to get married.
The theme continues. Marriage has been elevated to the be all and end all for people in society. The idealization of marriage makes it the only way to become fully accepted by your family and society. This hurts singles by making singlehood and singleness viewed as bad while marriage is good.
Happily Ever After
After you have found The One and gotten married, then you will have your life’s happy ending that is your life’s silver bullet. That is what happily every essentially means. This leads people to believe that their life will be happy and without problems after they get married and marry The One, which is not true. Since marriage is associated with happily ever after, being single is equated to sadness and loneliness.
White Picket Fence
After you get married and have your happily ever after, you will get your white picket fence and 2.5 children and live a fantastic wonderful life free of trouble with your true love.
These are the ten main ways that society and popular culture raises marriage to the miracle of social drug that it simply is not. Society idealizes and fetishizes marriage into something that can only be found in fairy tales and movies. The next time that you are watching a movie or discussing relationships with someone, be aware of these ten things, and don’t fall for society’s trap. Be realistic singles and enjoy being single.