There’s a thing about being depressed and single, especially if you don’t want to be going solo. Third wheel status can feel exhausting. Being single can feel like a burden. I understand how you think because I used to be in the lonely and depressed one-woman boat myself. But luckily some ways can help you cope with being single (even when you want to be in a serious relationship).
Some people think it’s impossible to be single and happy.
They think single and lonely depression is par for the course. However, It doesn’t have to be that way. I have a friend who despises being alone and hates to see the pictures of happy families, newlyweds on their “perfect” honeymoons. It just bums her out completely. There’s also something else you can do about this.
Milk other people’s love.
I know it sounds weird. But if being alone is making you depressed, you can stop cringing on the inside for just one minute when you see a couple making goo-goo eyes at each other, that’s an excellent place to start.
Love vibes are coming your way.
Every couple that you see in love is a signpost that you are on the right path. They are there to show you that love is possible— even for you! You just have to believe it.
The first thing to do is get present.
And I don’t mean go out and buy them a mango peeler/slicer they’ll never use. Get present with your self and open yourself up to love. If you feel sad about seeing someone else happy, don’t beat yourself up about it if it bums you out. But you don’t have to stay single and depressed.
Don’t let bad feelings run your life, because they can if you let them.
Let sad feelings process. Because stuffing down feelings or turning to hate instead them will only keep you in a negative place. So don’t beat them up with your words in your mind, do a little shift.
Breathe in the love and breathe out the sadness/ anger/ hate.
These lovers with the little dippers in their eyes don’t have it all. But they have love to give, and receive and so do you.
So every time you see a happy couple let it be a reminder to keep yourself in a loving space.
Sure, maybe they’re getting more regular sex and hugs than you, and it pisses you off. But they’re also dealing with their hubby shaving and leaving beard hair in the sink. And he’s got to stumble through the closet cluttered with 87 pair of high heels (that to him) look identical.
People in love are starring in their own romantic comedy, and trust me, it’s not all pink Gerber daisies and date nights in 5-star restaurants. But they do share something more.
Rember these lovers are ordinary people— just like you.
They just happened to find their person. Trust that there is someone out there for you too.
Instead of dispising their passionate glances at one another tap into the love feelings that are in your space. Because people in love are oozing it out of every pore all over their body. So you might as well take a big drink.
Get yourself a love hormone margarita without the usual saltiness.
Instead, try a little sugar on the rim. You’ll be glad you did.
Take a deep breath. And imagine what it would feel like to find your perfect person. Imagine how sweet their lips will taste on yours. Because if you’ve been putting the vibes out there to meet someone for a long time, your person is out their too you just haven’t found them yet.
They’re not going to be perfect. You’ll find sesame seeds from their morning bagel all over the counter or dirty socks on the floor. But you won’t care because you are open to love an so are they. So think about meeting your partner just before you hit the sheets. And while you’re sleeping the universe will have time to work its magic.
Lots of Love,
Dina Colada is a contributing author at Secure Single LLC. You can connect with her at DinaColada.com for loads of dating advice and profile makeovers or on Instagram.