Do you think you may be in a friendship that only goes one way? Beware these five signs of a one-sided friendship!

Beware These 5 Signs Of A One-Sided Friendship 

Everything Is About Them 

The person makes everything about them. They will only discuss their interests, hobbies, wants, and needs. The person makes no effort to listen to the other person.

When you decide to get together with that person, they often choose where to go and what to do. You may not have a choice in the matter.

In contrast, a sign of a good friend is they have empathy. They want to talk to you. They want to listen to you. They ask you questions. It is a two-sided friendship, not a one-sided friendship.

They Never Open Up 

Some people just have more of a difficult time opening up. It could be because they are introverted, they may be autistic, or it may be for any number of reasons. They may have difficulty expressing emotions or not want to tell them. It could also be that they do not know how to express feelings to others besides a strong emotion such as anger.

They are not interested in giving details about what is going on in their personal life. The individual’s inability to open up may have nothing to do with their feelings about your friendship.

In your personal interactions, the person will feel off or empty. It can make it challenging to connect with the person since you cannot clearly understand who they are and where they are coming from since they do not open up.

You Know You Cannot Count On Them 

You can never count on them. For anything. They cancel on you. They may tell you that they forgot. The person may be annoyed or angry at you. They have no problem telling people confidential information or stories you do not want to be told.

A good friend makes a point of getting together to talk and catch up. They will arrive on time or inform you if they are behind schedule.

They Do What Is Convenient 

They are never the ones to initiate getting together. You are the one who always texts or calls them to do something. The only time they may contact someone is if they need something. They are always asking for or expecting favors or something in return. To them, the friendship is transactional. The worst-case scenario is that this friend is using you.

A good friend does not manipulate you to their ends. They genuinely want to spend time together. It may be going out for coffee, drinks, or the park.

Behavior Follows A Pattern 

Some people may need more assistance from other people for mental health or personal reasons. They could be dealing with depression, be on the autism spectrum, or have a hard time getting along with people.

It is not a friendship if you find yourself doing all the work in the friendship and they never reciprocate. It is assistance. They may not be invested or interested in the friendship.

What Is Friendship?

According to the Stanford Encyclopedia of Philosophy, “Friendship… is a distinctively personal relationship that is grounded in a concern on the part of each friend for the welfare of the other, for the other’s sake, and that involves some degree of intimacy.” It simply means that you care about each other to some degree.

There are different levels of friendship, from an acquaintance to a lover to a spouse. The deeper and more intimate the friendship is, the more serious it will be. Many people may mistake an acquaintance for a friendship. In the social media age, many “friends” are really not your friends. They are merely connections on the Internet with random people.

Contrary to popular belief, ending a bad friendship is a sign of maturity for an individual. There is nothing wrong with blocking toxic and negative people out of one’s life. It is beneficial.

Secure Single recommends:


The signs of a one-signed friendship may indicate that the person is toxic. It is best to avoid negative people. You could end the friendship with this person if it has always been one-sided.

Views expressed in this article are the author’s opinions and do not necessarily reflect the views of Secure Single. It is intended for informational and educational purposes only. It is not investment or financial advice. James Bollen is the author of Thriving Solo: How to Flourish and Live Your Perfect Life (Without A Soulmate). Now available in paperback and for the Kindle on Amazon. Subscribe to Secure Single’s Substack for free!
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James Bollen is the Founder and President of Secure Single. He is an entrepreneur and a content creator with the goal of helping all different types of singles to learn to thrive as a single person.
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