Sex is an integral part of human life, but it has become overly idolized in society. It is time to take back control of your life and embrace a sexless lifestyle. Here are ten compelling reasons why you should consider this option.
The Empowerment Of Choosing A Sexless Lifestyle
No Distractions Or Addictions
Are you tired of being distracted by romantic and erotic relationships? These relationships can take away your valuable time, energy, and attention. And what if the relationship doesn’t work out? You are left with even more pain and heartache.
But guess what? You don’t have to be in a relationship if you’re not ready or don’t want to be. Choosing to live a sexless life can do wonders for your self-improvement journey. Without the distractions or addictions of romantic relationships, you can focus on yourself, your goals, and your passions.
So, take control of your life and say no to these distractions. Choose to prioritize self-improvement by living a sexless life, either temporarily or permanently. It’s time to focus on what really matters – you.
Internal Validation
Internal validation and external validation are two opposing concepts. External validation relies on being validated by others, such as receiving likes and followers on social media or owning the latest trendy product.
On the other hand, internal validation is about goal-setting and working hard to achieve them. Accomplishing these goals helps build self-confidence, a crucial aspect of personal success.
Goal Setting
Setting goals is critical to measuring success. You can use the SMART goals system. The acronym stands for:
- Specific
- Measurable
- Achievable
- Relevant
- Time-bound
Following this strategy makes you more likely to accomplish your goals.
Self-Discipline
Self-discipline is crucial for a fulfilling life. Practicing self-discipline and avoiding distractions like social media, sex, news, or politics is vital for your well-being.
Taking responsibility for your actions and being mindful of your decisions can positively impact you. Every decision you make has the potential to affect us positively or negatively. You must practice discipline and act intentionally to achieve your goals.
Self-Control
Self-control is useful when controlling your urges and reaching your goals. Learning self-control is essential, not letting sex or romantic relationships control your life. Instead of engaging in constant dating, watching porn every night, or browsing cam sites regularly, it’s best to practice self-control.
By practicing self-control, you can use your valuable time and attention better and channel them towards achieving your goals.
Self-Learning
Self-learning is critical to achieving personal success. The education system teaches you how to be a good employee but does not teach you critical thinking and life skills.
Self-education is power. You can continue to dive as deep into a topic you want to learn more about. Today, you watch videos, read blog articles, or purchase a digital course on a topic.
Only education with application is valuable. What you are teaching yourself must improve your life in some way. Self-study is the best way to learn applicable skills. You know the skills you need to learn to advance your career, switch fields, or raise your income.
Discover Your Obsession
Instead of fixating on someone of the opposite sex, take some time to discover your true obsession. Your obsession is likely what you are meant to do, giving you a sense of inner peace and purpose when engaging in it.
Once you have identified your obsession, focus on developing the skills related to it and turning it into a career.
Master Your Skills
Discovering your skills in your twenties is crucial to achieving success. Distractions may lead you to believe you can do something you’re not proficient at, but this will only waste your valuable time and delay your income.
For instance, I began a YouTube channel to make money online from advertising revenue. However, I lack the charisma and fun personality necessary to succeed on video platforms. After making a few hundred videos, I accepted that I am better at creating written content than video content. Know and play to your strengths and learn from your mistakes.
Mastering a core skill in something you enjoy doing is the key to success. Expanding to complementary skills only enhances your abilities, making you more valuable in the job market. Having multiple skills in the same niche keeps you on the path to excellence, and it is a sure way to stand out from the crowd.
Increase Your Income
It is essential to constantly work on increasing your income. The money you earn loses its value each month due to inflation. Even at a low rate of 2% inflation, you are losing money. Over a year, your money loses 24% due to compounding inflation.
More than saving money is needed as inflation eats away at your money. To combat this, you must find ways to raise your yearly income. Some options are investing in the stock market, becoming a landlord, purchasing a house (as long as the market does not fall), or starting an online business. You can even combine these options, such as investing in the stock market and reinvesting profits to start an online business.
If functioning correctly, a business can generate a higher return on investment than certain stocks. However, you must determine how to monetize your business by selling products or services.
By combining investments with a business, you have a greater chance of betting on the actual inflation rate. Any income you make beyond the inflationary rate can help you build wealth, which you can reinvest into other asset classes.
To build personal wealth: invest, reinvest, and repeat. Once you have wealth, preserve it.
Freedom
Investing time and money in dating might be tempting if you are single. However, you could be missing out on the freedom of being single. Embrace this freedom to focus on yourself, achieve your goals, and become the best version of yourself without any distractions.
With the freedom of being single, you can spend quality time with friends, family, and your community. You can also learn how to use your professional connections to advance your career or grow your business.
Remember your health. Focusing on fitness and nutrition can make you happier, healthier, and more confident.
By directing your time, attention, and energy toward your personal and professional goals, you can make them a reality. Additionally, wisely invest your finances to build wealth and secure your future.
The choice is yours—will you take advantage of this freedom or waste it on another bad romantic relationship?
Remember, improving yourself and achieving your goals is always possible. Make the most of your single life and become the best version of yourself.
Summary
Living a sexless lifestyle can help you achieve success. By practicing self-control, you can channel your energy into accomplishing great things. Don’t let societal pressures dictate your life. Take control and invest in yourself.
The views expressed in this article are the author’s opinions and do not necessarily reflect the views of Secure Single. It is intended for informational and educational purposes only and is not investment, financial, or legal advice. Consult with a financial or legal professional before making investment or legal decisions. James Bollen is the author of Thriving Solo: How to Flourish and Live Your Perfect Life (Without A Soulmate). It is now available in paperback and Kindle on Amazon.
A calendar is a clock that controls your life. Once you understand its purpose is to help you properly manage your time, you can dictate how you use it. Using the 24-hour clock on your calendar daily can help you reach your goals and experience success. Here are twelve ways to use your calendar effectively.
12 Ways To Use Your Calendar Effectively
Life Is Dictated By Units Of Time
Units of time dictate life. Once you understand this, a calendar helps you to manage your time better.
A calendar measures daily time units and forces you to set daily deadlines. There are minutes, hours, days, months, and years. You can learn to use the calendar properly to achieve a desired short-term to long-term goal by the final date you set for yourself.
Learning to manage the units of time well each day makes more sense. Each day is time. Instead of focusing on tasks, learn time management to optimize each unit of time daily.
Behavioral Change
A calendar forces you to change your behavior. It represents the tasks you need to get done. Consistently placing reminders on a calendar can subtly change your behavior.
Some examples of how having a calendar can create positive behavioral change:
- Place on your calendar to read for 30 minutes each day
- Spend 1 hour a day going through the digital course you purchased
- Forcing yourself to finish a large project within one week
Tasks
A calendar accounts for your valuable time regarding tasks and reminders. You prioritize the tasks that are most vital to finish within 24 hours. A calendar helps to eliminate the paradox of choice. You know what tasks are scheduled for your calendar to do for each.
By forcing yourself to not focus on many things but on critical daily tasks, calendars also help to increase the level of creating output.
Reminders
You can set reminders on your phone’s calendar to finish tasks or projects by a deadline. The reminders help to incentivize you to finish them.
You can also put reminders for low-value tasks that must get done each month:
- Pay off your credit card
- Pay your bills
- Send a follow-up email
- Schedule an appointment
- Call or text someone on their birthday
Simple
A calendar is simple. You can use a physical, computer, or phone calendar. List the tasks you need to complete on a specific day.
Due to a calendar’s simplicity, it is easier to manage. It is clear what you need to get done. If it is on your calendar, then it is a priority for you to finish.
Easy To Organize
A calendar is more straightforward to organize. You can break down the 24 hours that make up each day. Within each hour, you can break it down to minutes. You can then visually see the allotted time to dedicate to each task.
Additional Pressure
A calendar adds additional pressure. If you do not finish something on your calendar by the due date, you know you have failed to meet your deadline. The pressure encourages you to want to finish your project by the deadline you set for yourself.
Clear Deadlines
You can set clear deadlines. You can set deadlines on your phone or computer calendar. Then, you will know the day and time you must finish the task. You will then successfully or fail to meet your deadlines.
Reach Your Goals
A calendar helps you reach your goals. You can allocate a specific part of a day to finishing a small goal while allocating another part to working on a larger goal. There is a time and date that you must finish a task or project.
For example, a small goal could be filming a YouTube video, while a more significant goal could be writing 1,000 words for the book you want to self-publish.
Invite A Friend Or Accountability Coach To Your Calendar
You can invite a friend or an accountability coach to your phone or computer’s calendar. Accountability adds even more pressure to help you accomplish your goal by your calendar’s deadline. You will know that if you fail to finish the task by your deadline, you will have to tell your friend or accountability coach that you failed.
You can incentivize accountability even more by gamifying the consequence of failing to achieve your goal on time. If you do not reach your deadline, you could:
- Pay your friend $20
- Buy your friend’s groceries
- You could buy their meal or drinks the next time you both go out
Schedule Meetings
A calendar is a great way to schedule meetings. Calendars on computers and phones can sync with various apps. Some everyday apps that are helpful for meetings are Skype and Zoom.
Not only can it help you schedule your appointments, but syncing your calendar with apps like Skype and Zoom can make your meetings more efficient and productive.
Successful People Use Calendar
Successful individuals understand that time is a valuable asset. Therefore, they don’t rely on to-do lists alone. Instead, they assign specific times and dates on their calendars for when they must finish a particular task or goal. This approach not only enhances their overall productivity but also increases the likelihood of achieving their set goals.
Summary
Using a calendar is a superior way to manage your time effectively than relying on a to-do list. Why not scrap the to-do list and start using a calendar today? You will be amazed at how much more productive and in control you will feel.
The views expressed in this article are the author’s opinions and do not necessarily reflect the views of Secure Single. It is intended for informational and educational purposes only and is not investment, financial, or legal advice. Consult with a financial or legal professional before making investment or legal decisions. James Bollen is the author of Thriving Solo: How to Flourish and Live Your Perfect Life (Without A Soulmate). It is now available in paperback and Kindle on Amazon.
How often do you go grocery shopping alone? Here is the ultimate guide to how to grocery shop for one!
How To Grocery Shop For One
Never Go Grocery Shopping Hungry
One great rule to follow when grocery shopping is to avoid going to the store on an empty stomach. Why? You may purchase more food than necessary or buy pre-made meals from the store’s deli section. The result is that you could spend more money than you would if you had gone to the store after eating a proper meal.
Shopping List
Bringing a shopping list when you go grocery shopping or run errands is always a good idea. A shopping list is a valuable tool that can help you save money. Your shopping list should include all the items you need to buy at the store.
I use a shopping list app on my phone whenever I go shopping. This way, I can remember what I am buying and avoid buying something I do not need.
Follow A Budget
Learning money management skills is essential. Following a budget is one of the best ways to achieve that. For instance, setting a monthly grocery budget is an excellent way to manage your finances. You can then divide the monthly budget into weekly portions to determine how much you can spend each week.
Following a budget helps you learn to spend your money wisely at the store. Additionally, a budget enables you to develop self-discipline in managing your finances.
Use A Basket
You can opt for a shopping basket instead of a shopping cart at the grocery store’s entrance. The shopping basket helps limit the number of items you can purchase while shopping.
Keep Portions Small
Keep your portion size small. This makes meals more manageable cooking for oneself. Smaller portion sizes help to decrease food waste and gain weight.
Shop Sales
Shopping sales can help you to save extra money. You can substitute a brand or an item on your list for the one on sale.
For example, if you were planning to buy canned beans and the pinto beans were on sale, you could buy those. If there is a sale on a specific type of meat or vegetables when you go to the store, you could buy what is on discount rather than what is on your grocery list.
Another way to save extra money is by purchasing the store brand rather than the name brand
Pay With Cash Or A Debit Card
When you shop for groceries, you are most often making a small purchase. There is no reason to put minor purchases on a credit card. It is best to pay with cash or a debit card for groceries and other small items.
Use Coupons
If you want to save extra cash at the grocery store, using coupons is a fantastic option. You can get discounts on the items you need. Couponing is also an intelligent way to make your budget go further.
So why not try it and see how much you can save? Remember, there’s nothing wrong with using coupons!
Shop The Perimeter Of The Grocery Store
Did you know that fresh produce and meat are usually found around the store’s perimeter when you shop at a grocery store? Sticking to the outside aisles allows you to find various fresh and nutritious meal options.
On the other hand, processed and canned foods tend to be located toward the center of the store. So, next time you are at the grocery store, consider shopping the perimeter for healthier options to nourish your body.
Freeze Your Leftovers
If you have any leftovers, it is a good idea to freeze them. Remember to write the best-by date when storing food in the container or freezer bag. Additionally, you can put a sticker on the food in your refrigerator that indicates when it will expire.
These simple steps can help you better track your leftovers and avoid wasting food.
Summary
These are ten strategies for grocery shopping for one person. Cooking for oneself can save money and is also a valuable life skill.
Is there a strategy that you use when you go grocery shopping? Let me know in the comments.
The views expressed in this article are the author’s opinions and do not necessarily reflect the views of Secure Single. It is intended for informational and educational purposes only and is not investment, financial, or legal advice. Consult with a financial or legal professional before making investment or legal decisions. James Bollen is the author of Thriving Solo: How to Flourish and Live Your Perfect Life (Without A Soulmate). It is now available in paperback and for the Kindle on Amazon.
People who lack self-confidence are easier to manipulate. They will obey. Here is the shocking truth about lacking confidence that society does not want you to know.
Shocking Truth About Lacking Confidence
Society wants people who are not confident. They are easier to control. They will do as they are told. They will not question the society’s social expectations. Once they are done doing what they are meant to do, they will be passive by watching entertainment.
In short, society wants timid people.
Traits Of People With No Self-Confidence
People who lack self-confidence can easily be pressured. They will often follow the crowd or the person perceived as the leader. They will do what other people tell them.
When a person lacks self-confidence, they are unsure of themselves. They do not know their strengths or weaknesses. They are willing to give up having to work to better themselves.
How Society Creates Insecure People
The education system is the first way society molds insecure people. The education system makes people afraid of failing on tests. It teaches people that to fail is harmful rather than to learn from it. The true purpose of the education system is to make a person into an obedient employee.
As an employee, you are given the faint hope of working for a company or in a career field. The hope is to increase your pay to beat inflation. An employee must obey and do what the employer says. If you go out of line, you will be fired. The fear of losing a job and living without a paycheck makes people fearful.
Two Ways Society Makes People Insecure
The two main ways how people are made insecure are by being fearful of losing their jobs and failing. Fear is then pumped every day on the news. It is pushed in politics. People then give up their individuality to a perceived expert or an employer rather than working to better themselves.
Summary
If you live in fear and are afraid of failure, you are doing exactly what society wants you to do. Discover your strengths, invest in yourself, and stop living in fear. Failure is one of the best ways to learn. Embrace your full potential by learning about yourself. You can then begin to develop self-confidence.
Views expressed in this article are the author’s opinions and do not necessarily reflect the views of Secure Single. It is intended for informational and educational purposes only. It is not investment, financial, or legal advice. Consult with a financial or legal professional before making an investment or legal decision. James Bollen is the author of Thriving Solo: How to Flourish and Live Your Perfect Life (Without A Soulmate). It is now available in paperback and for the Kindle on Amazon.
Being single is a time to invest in oneself. A critical aspect of focusing on oneself is self-development. Here is a look at the connection between single life and self-development.
Connection Between The Single Life And Self-Development
The single is a time to work on oneself. It is a time to become the best version of yourself. It does not matter why you may be single or if you want to date or marry eventually. Self-work allows you to reach your goals or prepare for a relationship later. There are three critical areas that singles can focus on.
Personal Finance
Money management is critical. Money is used every day. Even if you do not spend money, it could be compounding to earn interest or increase the debt owed. It is critical to get one’s finances in order. Many Americans are in debt. This is because many were never taught the basics of personal finance. I had to learn personal finance on my own. It was never taught to me in school. The three basics of personal finance are:
• Stay out of debt
• Save money
• Invest money
Debt
If you have debt, there are two main strategies to pay it off: snowball or avalanche. With the snowball method, pay off the smallest debt first. In contrast, with the avalanche method, you pay the debt with the highest interest rates. The advantage of the avalanche strategy is that the debts with the highest interest rates will compound the fastest, which means you will have to pay more later. By tackling them first, they get paid off first. With both methods, you will pay the minimum each month unless you have an extra month to pay off the debt.
Savings Account
Work to save money. Two ways to grow savings is to put a portion of each paycheck into a high-yield savings account or a money market account. The initial first goal is to build an emergency fund. $10,000 is the first goal to create a rainy day fund in a money market or high-yield savings account. Aim to continue to build up your savings. After enough money is saved, begin to invest money.
Investments
Investing is finding ways to make your money work for you. Ways to invest include starting an online business, the stock market, and real estate. Once you have income from one investment, reinvest it into another asset class. This will allow you to be diversified among many types of financial assets. Some may do poorly during times that others do well.
Relationships
Relationships are vital to one’s health. Relationships do not have to be romantic. A variety of relationships can help you grow as an individual.
Friendship
Friends can help in your self-development. The people you surround yourself with will often have similar interests and be like-minded. To be successful, you must surround yourself with other successful people.
Family
Spend time with your family. Not everyone gets along with their family, including estranged families, but you are connected by blood and genealogy.
Community
Community Find a community that you enjoy spending time with where you live. A community is built around you. You are the one who chooses who is in your network. It could include casual acquaintances from church, a bar, or a monthly event in your area.
Self-Development
Self-Discipline
Self-discipline plays a critical role in one’s success. Time management connects with self-discipline. Without discipline, you will be distracted by many things that prevent you from reaching your goals.
A time management strategy I use is to do the tasks I do not enjoy in the morning: emails, phone calls, and running errands. Those are smaller tasks. I then work on busy tasks: writing a blog post, writing a Substack post, or posting a video on YouTube. The busy work helps me to reach a larger goal. A bigger goal could be working to self-publish another book, create a digital course, or find some way to increase income.
Self-Responsibility
Self-responsibility, along with discipline, is foundational to success. By accepting responsibility, you recognize that you are responsible for your choices and the consequences of your decisions. Good and bad.
Goal-Setting
Set goals. Without something to aim for, it is easy to waste time. It is easy to make excuses. An objective gives you something to aim for. When you complete a small, medium, or large goal, celebrate!
Secure Single recommends:
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A Record-High Number Of 40-Year-Olds Have Never Married
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15 Habits To Build Wealth For Singles
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Revealed: 10 Reasons Why People Do Not Like Therapists
Summary
These are three core ways that singles can focus on personal development. There is nothing wrong with being single. Use your time being single to become the best version of yourself!
Views expressed in this article are the author’s opinions and do not necessarily reflect the views of Secure Single. It is intended for informational and educational purposes only. It is not investment or financial advice. James Bollen is the author of Thriving Solo: How to Flourish and Live Your Perfect Life (Without A Soulmate). Now available in paperback and for the Kindle on Amazon. Subscribe to Secure Single’s Substack for free!
Do you think you may be in a friendship that only goes one way? Beware these five signs of a one-sided friendship!
Beware These 5 Signs Of A One-Sided Friendship
Everything Is About Them
The person makes everything about them. They will only discuss their interests, hobbies, wants, and needs. The person makes no effort to listen to the other person.
When you decide to get together with that person, they often choose where to go and what to do. You may not have a choice in the matter.
In contrast, a sign of a good friend is they have empathy. They want to talk to you. They want to listen to you. They ask you questions. It is a two-sided friendship, not a one-sided friendship.
They Never Open Up
Some people just have more of a difficult time opening up. It could be because they are introverted, they may be autistic, or it may be for any number of reasons. They may have difficulty expressing emotions or not want to tell them. It could also be that they do not know how to express feelings to others besides a strong emotion such as anger.
They are not interested in giving details about what is going on in their personal life. The individual’s inability to open up may have nothing to do with their feelings about your friendship.
In your personal interactions, the person will feel off or empty. It can make it challenging to connect with the person since you cannot clearly understand who they are and where they are coming from since they do not open up.
You Know You Cannot Count On Them
You can never count on them. For anything. They cancel on you. They may tell you that they forgot. The person may be annoyed or angry at you. They have no problem telling people confidential information or stories you do not want to be told.
A good friend makes a point of getting together to talk and catch up. They will arrive on time or inform you if they are behind schedule.
They Do What Is Convenient
They are never the ones to initiate getting together. You are the one who always texts or calls them to do something. The only time they may contact someone is if they need something. They are always asking for or expecting favors or something in return. To them, the friendship is transactional. The worst-case scenario is that this friend is using you.
A good friend does not manipulate you to their ends. They genuinely want to spend time together. It may be going out for coffee, drinks, or the park.
Behavior Follows A Pattern
Some people may need more assistance from other people for mental health or personal reasons. They could be dealing with depression, be on the autism spectrum, or have a hard time getting along with people.
It is not a friendship if you find yourself doing all the work in the friendship and they never reciprocate. It is assistance. They may not be invested or interested in the friendship.
What Is Friendship?
According to the Stanford Encyclopedia of Philosophy, “Friendship… is a distinctively personal relationship that is grounded in a concern on the part of each friend for the welfare of the other, for the other’s sake, and that involves some degree of intimacy.” It simply means that you care about each other to some degree.
There are different levels of friendship, from an acquaintance to a lover to a spouse. The deeper and more intimate the friendship is, the more serious it will be. Many people may mistake an acquaintance for a friendship. In the social media age, many “friends” are really not your friends. They are merely connections on the Internet with random people.
Contrary to popular belief, ending a bad friendship is a sign of maturity for an individual. There is nothing wrong with blocking toxic and negative people out of one’s life. It is beneficial.
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Summary
The signs of a one-signed friendship may indicate that the person is toxic. It is best to avoid negative people. You could end the friendship with this person if it has always been one-sided.
Views expressed in this article are the author’s opinions and do not necessarily reflect the views of Secure Single. It is intended for informational and educational purposes only. It is not investment or financial advice. James Bollen is the author of Thriving Solo: How to Flourish and Live Your Perfect Life (Without A Soulmate). Now available in paperback and for the Kindle on Amazon. Subscribe to Secure Single’s Substack for free!
New Year’s is approaching. 2023 will become 2024. Making New Year’s Resolutions is a popular thing to do at the end of the year. Here is a look at the problem with New Year’s resolutions.
The Problem With New Year’s Resolutions
Many People Do Not Keep Their New Year’s Resolutions
The main problem with New Year’s resolutions is that many never keep them. Someone may participate because their friends are making New Year’s resolutions. It is the thing that people do at the end of every year.
People do not stick to their resolutions because they are more of a social thing. As a result, it is just what people are told to do at the end of each year.
According to Forbes, most people fail to keep their New Year’s resolution by the third month. This is not surprising since, in the same article, Forbes writes, “62% say they feel pressured to set a new year’s resolution.” If someone feels pressured to do something, they most likely will not do it.
A person must want to actively choose to make a change, set a goal, and devise a plan. Resolutions are not goals.
Resolutions Are Not Goals
A resolution is different from a goal. The Wordnik Dictionary defines resolutions as “a firm decision to do something.” In contrast, Merriam-Webster’s Dictionary defines a goal as “the end toward which effort is directed,” an aim.
A New Year’s resolution is simply choosing to do something without an end in mind. There must be some aim or objective that one is working to complete. If it is abstract and without a process of achieving it, most people will not finish a short or long-term goal. For this reason, it is best to set goals.
Forget about having a New Year’s resolution this year. Instead, decide to set a goal.
Summary
The problem with New Year’s resolutions is that they are not goals. Goal setting is different from a resolution. A resolution is vague. A goal is an aim that a person is working to complete.
Views expressed in this article are the author’s opinions and do not necessarily reflect the views of Secure Single. It is intended for informational and educational purposes only. It is not investment or financial advice. James Bollen is the author of Thriving Solo: How to Flourish and Live Your Perfect Life (Without A Soulmate). Now available in paperback and for the Kindle on Amazon. Subscribe to Secure Single’s Substack for free!
People have outsourced their critical thinking skills and self-responsibility to “experts” and “institutions.” The consequence is a decline in confidence. Here are five reasons for the growing lack of self-confidence in young people.
5 Reasons For The Growing Lack Of Self-Confidence In Young People
College
Young people were told they must go to college. This is a problem. Many alternatives to college continue to go unrecognized by society and parents. Some other options include learning the trade, working, and starting an online business.
The amount of attention that college receives is unbelievable. College consists of reading boring textbooks to take a quiz to please a professor. Employers then care more about what college people attended and their GPA than if they have the right skills to do a job. By studying for exams, people do not learn practical skills.
Hard skills are learned by doing something. They are not learned by reading from a stupid textbook and listening to a professor.
College creates insecure individuals by indoctrinating young people that a professor who has a Ph.D. knows more than them. Academics are the last people young people should learn from. Young people should learn from people with a proven track record of success in a field that interests them.
College was the 20th century way of learning. The 21st-century way is reading articles, watching videos, and purchasing digital courses from people with experience in a topic or skill you want to learn.
Related – 12 Reasons Why Young People Should Not Go To College
Personal Finance
Another problem is that many young people were never taught the basics of personal finance. There is a connection between financial instability and suicide. Financial success plays a critical role in developing self-confidence. Not everyone needs to become a millionaire to be financially free. Just do not have any debt to allow you to save and invest.
The problem is that the US dollar and the financial system are based on debt. Society encourages car loans, student loans, credit cards, mortgages, and living beyond your means to get people into debt. The goal is to get as many people into debt as possible.
Learn and follow the basics of personal finance:
- Stay out of debt
- Live below your means
- Save money
- Build an emergency fund
- Once you have enough money saved, invest in tangible assets
Financial insecurity leads to uncertainty. Personal finance is foundational to a prosperous life. Follow essential personal finance principles, and you will be ahead of most people.
Comparing Themselves To People On Social Media
Social media contributes to low confidence because people constantly compare themselves to others on social media. They may see that someone received thousands of likes for a post. Another person may have a million followers. They may have seen an influencer post a photo or video of them on vacation and partying.
Turn off social media. Spend time outside. Focus on yourself. Work to reach goals. Invest in yourself. You will feel better and more confident once you stop comparing yourself to the people you see online.
Hustle Culture
Young people have been raised in the hustle culture. It is what they know. All that most people know is working multiple part-time and gig jobs. The consequence is the loss of stable employment. It is difficult to find traditional jobs that provide benefits from a pension to vacation days. It is now all about hustling every day.
Work with no days off. Work every day. Life has become work. Work is how many people think they discover meaning.
Find ways to leave the hustle culture. Start to focus on your strengths and find ways to monetize them. The wonderful thing about the 21st century is the variety of jobs that can be done online, even starting an online business.
Related – 15 Habits To Build Wealth For Singles
Retirement
Retirement is becoming more of a pipe dream for many young people. Why? Many have already been priced out of being able to afford a home or the stock market and do not have enough saved for retirement. Many Americans do not even have enough money to cover an emergency.
A solution is to consider semi-retirement. This means still working when you are older. But you can work to build passive income streams beginning today. Those passive income streams can provide income by constantly appearing in your bank account.
Stop trading time, attention, and energy for active income. Work to build passive income streams to help you to semi-retire. A simple strategy like planning for semi-retirement can help boost confidence.
How To Develop Self-Confidence
In a world that feels like it is always against you and there is no way to get ahead, is there a way to develop self-confidence? Yes!
There are many ways to develop self-confidence. Focus on health, relationships, and increasing income.
Ways to pay attention to health include:
- Being aware of portion sizes
- Following a diet
- Regularly exercising
- Getting exposed to sunlight
- Make sure to get enough sleep each night
Steps to improve relationships are:
- Reconnect with old friends
- Get to know people in your community
- Spend time with family
- Learn to enjoy time in solitude
- Get to know your neighbors
Strategies to increase income are:
- Work a weekend job
- Start a side hustle
- Discover ways to make passive income
- Find ways to make money online
- Start an online business
Practice self-responsibility. By accepting self-responsibility and setting goals daily, you will discover that you can do more than you were told. Set a schedule. Follow a to-do list. Complete short and long-term goals. Before you know it, you will be in a better position than you were before. You will also be happier.
Self-responsibility and investing in yourself by focusing on health, relationships, and personal finance are the secrets to building self-confidence.
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Summary
You are responsible for your own happiness, confidence, and prosperity. Take action today to start to reach a goal. Become the best version of yourself to thrive as a single person!
Views expressed in this article are the author’s opinions and do not necessarily reflect the views of Secure Single. It is intended for informational and educational purposes only. James Bollen is the author of Thriving Solo: How to Flourish and Live Your Perfect Life (Without A Soulmate). Now available in paperback and for the Kindle on Amazon. Subscribe to Secure Single’s Substack for free!
Should single men date? Society wants men to feel pressure from women to date and marry. This is especially true with cuffing season, which happens during the holidays. There are more critical things men can work on rather than seeking out a romantic relationship. Here are ten reasons for single men to avoid dating women during the holiday season.
10 Reasons For Single Men To Avoid Dating Women During The Holiday Season
Learn Game
Single men can learn game. It is then up to men to decide the relationships they want to pursue. It could be one-night stands or get into a more serious relationship eventually. Game can help men to develop self-confidence.
Game requires men to work to understand female psychology. It requires men to know about hypergamy. Men who choose to take the red pill do it to better themselves instead of always being on the lookout for a mate.
Save Money
Save money. Stay out of debt. Follow a budget. Learn the basics of money management. Work to reach the first two financial goals: to have a minimum of $10,000 saved in an emergency fund, then make your first $100,000.
Related – 50/30/20 Budget Versus 60/30/10 Budget
Invest Money
Start to invest money as soon as possible. Start small by putting money away in a high-interest savings account and money market fund. Invest money in the stock market, real estate, or business.
There are many types of investments outside of the stock market. Play to your strengths. Once you have money from one successful investment, reinvest some money into another investment to diversify your risk across asset classes.
Related – 15 Habits To Build Wealth For Singles
Build Passive Income Streams
Work to build passive income streams. The Internet has made it easier to create passive income streams. It is best to play to your strengths when looking to develop the first stream of passive income. You can then use the passive income streams to build an online business.
Start An Online Business
Start an online business. A business is the ultimate asset because you can continue to find ways to grow it and create revenue streams. There are many ways to monetize an online business today. Some strategies include:
- Advertisements on a website, YouTube, TikTok, or other social media platforms.
- Subscription services.
- Subscription newsletters (Substack or your own paid newsletter).
- Sell merch.
- Get a sponsor for content.
- Affiliate marketing.
- Sell digital products.
- Sell physical products.
- Provide a service to customers.
- Be a coach or consultant.
A business is a financial asset. Once the business starts to make money, you can pay yourself monthly from the income it generates. The objective of a business is to make a profit. Companies do that by providing products and services there is market demand.
Health
Single men can focus on their health. They can go to the gym. Regularly exercise. Follow a diet that they think works best. Get enough sunlight each day for Vitamin D.
Men can work to stay lean, fit, and build muscle. Looking your best can help men to be more confident in their professional and everyday lives. Self-confidence plays a vital role in success.
Hone Hard Skills
Hard skills are the most vital skills. Soft skills help with interpersonal relationships. It is hard skills that can help single men earn money, improve skills for work, and learn skills for business. The Interview Guys break down 112 examples of hard skills. Hard skills include:
- Data analysis
- QuickBooks
- Photoshop
- Video editing
- Bookkeeping
- Profit forecasting
- Statistics
- Automation
- Machine operation
- Forklift driving
- Google Analytics
- Graphic design
- Copywriting
- Carpentry
- Plumbing
- Electrical
- Nutrition
- Surgery
- Typing
- Sale pitches
Master one skill you are naturally good at in an area of interest, then move on to learn more skills. Many skills will overlap with each other. For example, sales skills naturally lend themselves to marketing and business.
Solitude
There are benefits to spending time in solitude. Solitude helps with creativity, productivity, and increasing focus. Instead of being distracted by social media, a romantic relationship, or steaming content, you can spend time in solitude to help you reach your goals.
There is no reason always to socialize. Learn your interests, be productive, and spend time working to reach your goals. People can be distractions. Solitude can be a time to invest in yourself!
Related – Alone Versus Lonely
Invest In Yourself
Society tells men to focus on romantic relationships. If men are not dating, then they are losers. It is best to invest in yourself. It is vital for men to work to increase their income, grow their net worth, and continue developing skills.
Once you are financially stable, men can decide if they want to date or remain single. There is nothing wrong with either choice. People are staying single for longer today.
The best investment is in yourself. Invest in yourself first before you start to invest in others.
Travel Abroad
Travel abroad. Traveling is an excellent way to expose yourself to other cultures, traditions, and values different from your country. Try to avoid the main tourist locations as much as possible when traveling. It is best to go where the locals go when traveling. Traveling can help you to broaden your views about the world.
If you make enough money, consider investing in a second passport or country you enjoy. Live there part-time or full-time.
When I traveled to Greece with my dad before college, we had a great cab driver. The cab driver drove us around the lower parts of Greece for our trip. He helped us stay in the local hotels and find the best restaurants rather than just going to the more expensive tourist traps.
Related – Solo Travel: Tip for Trips for Singles to See the World Alone
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Summary
Cuffing season is here. Men will feel pressure to date from friends and family. Ultimately, it is best for single men to invest in themselves.
Avoid dating women. Avoid romantic relationships. Invest in yourself to thrive as a single person!
Views expressed in this article are opinions of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of Secure Single. It is intended for informational and educational purposes only. James Bollen is the author of Thriving Solo: How to Flourish and Live Your Perfect Life (Without A Soulmate). Now available in paperback on Amazon. Subscribe to Secure Single’s Substack for free!
There are many distractions you can focus on: romantic relationships, politics, and the news. Instead of focusing on external distractions, begin to invest in yourself. Self-investment is the best way to thrive.
7 Types Of Self-Investment
Self-investment means that you invest in yourself. There are many ways to do that:
• Self-education
• Personal finance
• Self-development
• Learn to cook
• Health
• Relationships
• Monetize your passion
Self-Education
Self-education plays a more critical role in one’s life than the education system. Self-study allows a person to learn more about what they find interesting. Self-education is one characteristic of self-made millionaires.
You can become a master of a topic or field through self-study. No fancy overpriced college degree is required.
Related – 12 Reasons Why Young People Should Not Go To College
Personal Finance
Personal finance plays a critical role in people’s daily lives. Master the basics of personal finance before working to move on to more advanced strategies to increase your income. The basics are:
- Stay out of debt
- Live below your means
- Follow a budget
- Spend less money than you make each month
- Save money
- Invest money
- Build an emergency fund
- Find ways to increase your income
- Build passive income streams
Start with the basics. Once the basics are done, focus on more advanced personal fiancé strategies like building passive income streams and starting an online business.
Related – 50/30/20 Budget Versus 60/30/10 Budget
Self-development
Self-development is concerned with working on oneself. Ultimately, each person must decide what is most important to them. A range of skills fall under the category of personal development:
- Hard skills
- Soft skills
- Interpersonal relationships
- Intrapersonal relationship
- Managing money
- Time management
- Develop a growth mindset
- Resiliency
- Mindfulness
- Practice gratitude
Learn To Cook
Learn to cook. Cooking is a way to save money. It is cheaper to make a meal for oneself than go out to eat or buy pre-prepared food. Start to use the kitchen more. Find and make simple recipes. Freeze the leftovers.
Health
Health is critical. There are many reasons to pay attention to personal health. When your health is terrible, you may be unable to work or be productive. Some ways to focus on health are:
- Regularly exercise
- Go to the gym
- Go for a daily walk
- Get enough sleep
- Get exposed to the sunlight for Vitamin D
- Regularly see a doctor
- Follow a healthy diet
- Lose weight
- Autophagy
Relationships
Relationships play a vital role in one’s life. The range of relationships include:
- Acquaintances
- Friends
- Colleagues at work
- Professional relationships (LinkedIn and professional networking)
- Community
- Family
- Romantic relationships
- Relationship with oneself
You must decide which relationship you want to focus on during each period of life. It will change as you mature and reach different life goals. There are times when it is best to develop oneself, while other times you may want to work to build a community around you where you live.
Find Ways To Monetize Your Passion
Jobs come and go, but you may never be out of work if you can find ways to monetize your passion. You will also enjoy work and want to do it each day. The Internet has made it easier to discover your interests. You no longer need to go to college, study, get a degree, and hope it works out. You can learn from people online by watching videos and purchasing digital courses.
You can then work to build your online presence. Build a business around a passion in a niche. People may eventually find you. You can then make money from:
- Advertisements
- Merch
- Digital products
- Physical products
- Services
- Subscriptions
- Royalties
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Summary
Self-investment is the best investment you can make. Focus on your health, learn to cook, master the basics of personal finance, cook for yourself, prioritize your health, develop relationships, and work to monetize your passion.