The church has focused so much on marriage it failed to recognize it has a church singles problem.

The church has a church singles problem. That is obvious. The church has focused so much on marriage and the importance of marriage that it has neglected the singles in the congregation. While some churches may have Christian young adult groups and Christian singles groups for the congregation, singles are implicitly or explicitly encouraged by the church to date and to marry. The church needs to reach out to singles by creating groups that foster and develop Christian singles. The singles small group can be made a place to develop friendships, grow deeper in understanding of the Bible, and to mature as a Christian. The Christian church has a church singles problem. Here are three ways it can work to address the church singles problem.

The Christian Church Singles Problem

Welcome Singles Without Pressure

Christian singles small group should work on better welcoming singles and reaching out to those who are single and unmarried who live by the church. The church can also work on improving its message to singles and to discuss singleness to the congregation at the same time. The small group and its leaders should better work to connect with and to talk to singles who are in the congregation as well as evangelizing to singles who may be live by the church. Christian singles small group and the church need to reach out to singles.


Christian singles small groups can reach out to singles in three different ways. First, they can welcome singles to the small group from both inside and outside the church. This will allow the group to reach out internally and externally of the church’s congregation. Second, Small groups can engage, evangelize, and to help their neighbors whether they are single, unmarried, or divorced. The third and final way is that small groups can discuss singleness and the church group discussions. The discussions can be about how singleness is recognized and acceptable in Christianity and work to fix the problem within the church of not talking about singleness in the church. The Christian singles small group can work internally and to influence the church’s leadership team to talk about singleness and to preach about singleness in the church.

Preach And Talk About Singleness

The church needs to improve its message to singles in the church and by preaching about singleness from the pulpit. Pastor Tim Keller of Redeemer Presbyterian Church in New York City gave a sermon on singleness that is fundamental to understanding the theology of singleness. Churches can utilize his sermon as a basis for the Bible verses and Church history that affirms singleness. This refocus on singleness, rather than marriage, will help the congregation and singles to learn to view single positively rather than as a negative time of life. The fact that Scripture affirms the single life and singleness makes it a need that church leadership and church pastors need to address to their congregation.


The church must do a better job to preach singleness to those who are single and unmarried. The church must also work much harder on reaching out to singles who are members of a congregation as well as evangelizing and welcoming singles who live nearby to explore the community of the church. There is much work to be done in the church. The simplest solution to move forward will be for the church to acknowledge singleness as a Biblical principle and then to begin to teach it congregations. If a are a member of a church singles group and you recognize that there is a church singles problem, let your pastor and congregation know!

Views expressed in this article are the author’s opinions and do not necessarily reflect the views of Secure Single. It is intended for informational and educational purposes only. It is not investment or financial advice. James Bollen is the author of Thriving Solo: How to Flourish and Live Your Perfect Life (Without A Soulmate). Now available in paperback and for the Kindle on Amazon. Subscribe to Secure Single’s Substack for free!
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James Bollen is the Founder and President of Secure Single. He is an entrepreneur and a content creator with the goal of helping all different types of singles to learn to thrive as a single person.
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