If you are single, and have a lot of time to yourself, you should check this out. These are three activities that every single should do to connect with others and be healthy. These three activities can help you become a better person and more well-rounded in society today.
3 Activities Every Single Needs To Do Today
Improve Your Relationships With Friends And Family
Your quality of your relationships with people is the measure of the quality of your life. Improve, amend, and fix the relationships in your life that need a little tender love and care. If you have moved to a new city as a young 20 something, you should keep in touch with visits to family and friends. Join a meetup group in your city, and work to improve your communication skills and build your circle of friend up. You can never go wrong when you are around good friends.
Take Time To Reflect
I feel like people don’t take time to sit and reflect. This can easily be done by meditating, and working to study what really makes you happy. I have found that pina coladas, getting caught in the rain, and doing yoga seems to do the trick (: Though, if you’re not into yoga, or any of that, take long walks and begin journaling at the end of your day to reflect. Through journaling, you achieve clarity. Life is always asking for us to, be, or give something — which is part of life. So you should keep at least an hour to yourself. The key to life is to find your happy place. You can do this, begin one step at a time.
Workout Your Mind And Body
You should definitely join a gym if you haven’t yet and you should stick to your routine. Also, pair this with reading quality books every day. Make it a goal to complete 1 to 2 books a month. You truly will benefit from improving your body and mind. You put out what you put in, so also remember to eat healthy items! Organic veggies, meats, nuts, and fruits. Through, a glass of red wine can do the trick after a long day of work to reward yourself.
There you have it singles. Be proud of who you are, and you will begin to build the life you intend one step at a time by making the most of being single with these activities. Just believe in yourself, love yourself, and improve your relationships, mind, body, and spirit. You got this!
Views expressed in this article are the author’s opinions and do not necessarily reflect the views of Secure Single. It is intended for informational and educational purposes only. It is not investment or financial advice. James Bollen is the author of Thriving Solo: How to Flourish and Live Your Perfect Life (Without A Soulmate). Now available in paperback and for the Kindle on Amazon. Subscribe to Secure Single’s Substack for free!
I recently attended a speed dating event this last weekend to attend a speed dating event to experience a way to people to meet potential dates. For those who do not know what speed dating is or how it works; Merriam Webster defines it as “an event at which each participant converses individually with all the prospective partners for a few minutes in order to select those with whom dates are desired.” For singles who are prospectively interested in seeking a romantic relationship, speed dating may be a reasonable option since there are now various types to better narrow down and meet someone who shares your values and life goals. I was there to help out my friend and was not particularly interested in meeting up with or dating someone after the event. Speed dating comes down to competition and being able to make the right first impression to potential suitors in seven minutes or less. The core lesson that I learned from this event by viewing it from a singleton’s perspective is dating is ultimately about competing for a mate.
There is a stereotype for the people who speed date that they are more socially awkward; therefore, they are unable to meet people in regular areas such as bars, restaurants, or meeting new people at social events. This is probably a half truth and is probably more accurate for the men who attend speed dating events compared to the women at an event. Speed dating essentially consists of only small talk and maybe time for one important question for prospects who are seeking to find a date after the event.
Dating is often viewed as a competition since men and women are fighting to attract and date the person who they found the most attractive and felt that they related the best to during the event. Men and women compete differently while dating, especially during speed dating events. For men, they compete by attempting to come across as having an established career, financially responsible, vast array of interests, and well-groomed and clean. However, as a woman commented to me during the speed dating experience who came to the event with friends, women often compete among themselves— whether friends or not – in order to get the attention of the main person who they are interested in at a dating event. Women being more competitive and choosy when they find prospective dates is consistent with evolution as summarized in the University of Los Angeles paper “Evolution and Close Relationships” explains:
The sex difference in minimal obligatory parental investment leads female mammals to be more choosy when picking mates, and it leads males to compete with one another to demonstrate their relative viability and superiority as mates.
Dating and romantic relationships are merely a competition to find a mate to continue a family name, experience intimacy, and to continue the human race.
This competition has become popularized with shows like The Bachelor and The Bachelorette by society and popular culture. The lesson that I learned while helping my friend run her speed dating event is that dating is the ultimate competitive sport; whether it is for a one night stand, a short term relationship, or a long term relationship. In short, dating is a tournament to find a mate.
Views expressed in this article are the author’s opinions and do not necessarily reflect the views of Secure Single. It is intended for informational and educational purposes only. It is not investment or financial advice. James Bollen is the author of Thriving Solo: How to Flourish and Live Your Perfect Life (Without A Soulmate). Now available in paperback and for the Kindle on Amazon. Subscribe to Secure Single’s Substack for free!
Abraham Maslow theorized in 1943 a proper psychological order of human needs. The goal of the Hierarchy of Needs is to achieve self-realization. Society focuses on love and marriage for singles in order for someone to become happy instead of for an individual being able to achieve self-realization. Singles should seek self-realization in life rather than listening to society’s mixed messages about love and relationships.
Singles And Self-Realization
According to Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs, an individual cannot properly achieve self-realization until fulfilling the deficient needs. Each of these needs build upon each other and cover different areas of human psychology: emotional, social, and intellectual. These lower needs are being able cope with life (shelter, water, food), learning to think for oneself, self- respect, cognitive needs, and achieving personal self-esteem needs and having a social circle. Society concentrates on the lowest needs of sex (tier one) and sexual intimacy (tier three) instead of the qualities associated with self-realization.
An individual must first love oneself before an individual is able to fully love another person. Society, though, elevates love and romance at the expense of an individual’s self-worth and self-realization. Society tells singles that being single is pathetic. Society tells individuals that if one wants to be viewed well by other then one must be dating or be in a romantic relationship. The consequence of this is that individuals, if they want to date or eventually get married, date too early before they know what they want in a mate in order to be accepted by others. This option, says society, is better than being the awkward third wheel or being alone and single. But is it? You decide. The consequence of society’s emphasis on love and romance makes individuals, and society as a whole, forget what basic life needs are for ethereal hopes of true love and finding one’s soul mate.
Once an individual fulfills the deficient needs than an individual can attain self-realization. The result is an individual is more confident and able to make more informed life decisions. An individual will be able to make these decisions because of a combination of personal experiences along with being able to discern social, emotional, and intellectual cues from life lessons. Self-realization than leads an individual being able to discover a life purpose that fulfills oneself and results in an individual wanting to achieve transcendence. Transcendence for Maslow meant morality (which is a complex and debated topic in philosophy), but the most basic form of morality means being able to love, empathize, and have compassion for others.
Life is an exciting and difficult trip ultimately to a final destination that everyone will eventually reach, but before one gets there hopefully an individually has successfully achieved the Hierarchy of Needs. Self-realization and the maturity that it bring are important in dealing with others in life and most importantly being able to deal with oneself. One should seek to be able to provide the deficient needs in life and aim to achieve self-realization in life by accepting facts about life, unleashing creativity, problem solving, being spontaneous, and being able to empathize with other humans.