Single men experience the pressure of fitting into and conforming to a gynocentric society. When a society becomes gynocentric, it makes everything have a focus around women. Gynocentrism is a problem for single men because anything about women becomes bad or toxic. The gynocentric focus has pushed the myth of toxic masculinity. The myth of toxic masculinity has now taken root in modern society. Single men can embrace positive masculinity and start to invest in themselves.

The Myth of Toxic Masculinity in a Gynocentric Social Order

What is Gynocentrism?

First, what is Gynocentrism? Gynocentrism (noun) is the “Dominant or exclusive focus on women in theory or practice; or to the advocacy of this. Sometimes practiced to the detriment of non-females.” Gynocentric (adjective) is “Anything can be considered gynocentric when it is concerned exclusively with a female (or specifically a feminist) point of view.” In sociology, Gynocentrism is “A pervasive cultural complex geared to prioritizing women and their interests.” The Oxford English Dictionary defines gynocentric (adjective) as “Centred on or concerned exclusively with women; taking a female (or specifically a feminist) point of view.”

“[Gynocentrism] is a worldview based on the implicit or explicit belief that the world revolves around women. It is therefore the counterpart of androcentrism, a worldview based on the implicit or explicit belief that the world revolves around men. Our point was that Gynocentrism has become de rigueur behind the scenes in law courts and government bureaucracies, which has resulted in systemic discrimination against men.” [p. 309] (Katherine K. Young and Paul Nathanson, Legalizing Misandry, 2006) This worldview leads to gynocentric feminism.

In brief, Gynocentrism believes that men must sacrifice themselves for women. Of course, that will look different for each man. Gynocentrism requires men to sacrifice their manhood, jobs, careers, and their masculinity at the altar of the gynocentric social order. It is vital to understand Gynocentrism and what a gynocentric society is since single men find themselves now living in a society today that has built a worldview around Gynocentrism.

Wage Gap Myth

A few critical Feminist myths continue to remain because Feminists don’t want to acknowledge the facts against their narrative. Time Magazine deconstructs the six central myths in “6 Feminist Myths That Will Not Die”. The wage gap is the most widely used one that feminists like to point to for their position. The reality is that women often choose to get more social degrees and work in social fields than men who work in STEM fields that pay more. Of course, there are always exceptions, but that is most often the case. Yet Feminists continue to cry foul while pushing the propaganda that women make less, which is a result of the fields women go into compared to men and the many variables. It is an economic myth, and Feminists need to start to be honest about the data.

The Consequences of Living in A Gynocentric Social Order

Those myths will only continue to persist because they result from living in a gynocentric social order today. Men are expendable in a gynocentric society. Instead of recognizing the intrinsic differences between men and women, a gynocentric society wants men to conform to it, hurting men in the long run. There are consequences for men living in a gynocentric social order. Rollo Tomassi summarizes some of the problems it creates for men in the video below. In brief, a gynocentric society creates a communitarian society. Yet, it still wants men to produce because men are naturally competitive.

The Myth of Toxic Masculinity

The gynocentric social order conditions men to believe that masculinity is harmful. Toxic masculinity has become “the catch-all phrase that houses all masculine guilt under one roof.” This social order tells men not to be confident, telling men not to work on themselves. The gynocentric social order says that it is wrong to disagree or even correct women. It also points out the dangers of questioning feminism and the gynocentric social order.

When men argue against today’s society’s current politically correct vocabulary, men have often attacked ad hominem for misogyny or mansplaining. All that mansplaining and using language such as toxic masculinity is a strategy to invent terminology to degrade and coerce men to be silent. Politically correct vocabulary leads to the destruction of language because words no longer have meaning since they can change them to fit the ever-changing Newspeak narrative. Manipulating and changing words is an implicit psychological tactic to suppress men to fit into the gynocentric social order.

The War on Masculinity

There is now a war on masculinity. It is an implicit series of battles that have been fought over time that been part of the culture war. If you are a man, society sees you as a problem. Words are power, so the myth of toxic masculinity is a tool to create weak men. The Internet, newspapers, magazines, movies, and television send messages that weaken men. For young men who are Millennials or younger, these men were raised by propaganda narratives from the gynocentric social order. Two famous or infamous narratives are the myth of toxic masculinity and the #MeToo Movement.

Toxic masculinity and #MeToo are weaponized propaganda to attack masculinity. The campaigns negatively attribute wrong actions that some men may have done to women to attribute that behavior to all-male behavior. Instead of rationally looking at what happened and objectively through a court of law, those movements use emotional appeal to growing. The consequence of #MeToo is that men are now uncomfortable being around women in the workplace or even just casually. Men realize that women could accuse them of predatory behavior in anything they do. Even if it is not true. A woman can falsely accuse a man of doing something he did not do. In that case, a woman will ruin a man’s professional reputation and career.

The Effect of the Myth of Toxic Masculinity on Society

The myth of toxic masculinity leads to a weak society. Toxic masculinity tells men something is wrong with them because they are male. When they show male traits such as being confident or assertive, gynocentrism labels men as displaying toxic masculinity. When they are just doing is displaying masculine traits. Some men will succumb to the gynocentric social order’s programming, resulting in weak men in society. These soft men are beta males and soy boys. Beta males and soy boys are men who go along with or believe in the gynocentric social order. Maybe they don’t know anything else, think that there is something wrong with masculinity, or are white knights. Weak men lead to a weak society which results in hard times. Weak men will not be willing to stand up when things become challenging or sacrifice themselves to protect their families and society when the hard times arrive. An example would be when the government starts to take away the rights of the people and becomes a totalitarian government.

Weak Men Create Hard Times

“Hard times create strong men. Strong men create good times. Good times create weak men. And, weak men create hard time.” – G. Michael Hopf, Those Who Remain

 

Men no longer need to go out to hunt and gather to provide for themselves or their families. Hunting and gathering have now been replaced with jobs at the workplace. But men are dropping out of the workforce, and many things have led to weak men in modern society.

Higher Education

Fewer men are also going to college today. The modern education system does not teach people how to think. In theory, the modern education system is supposed to help prepare students to find careers. The modern education system has failed at achieving that objective. Millennials can attest to this because the higher education system created degree inflation given the state of the current higher education system that is not necessarily a bad thing. But more people are now discovering themselves unemployed or underemployed, including men, despite doing what they were told to do, which was to go to college. There are other options for men to invest their time and money. Some men would instead go to trade school. Some men may prefer to start their own business or online business. Neither of those options requires having a college degree.

The higher education system has essentially become a place for propaganda and indoctrination. When men go through it, they will likely believe what their professors tell them about how the world should work compared to how it works, which leads to a victim mindset. The modern education system trains students to find things to blame. The list of things to blame includes patriarchy, capitalism, employers, landlords, and work. Rather than students learning valuable skills that will better themselves and make them more desirable to employers. The higher education system is now creating weak men rather than men who think critically and build things that will contribute to society.

Workplace

Men conventionally get more of their identity from work compared to women. The economy has drastically changed over the last decade. Still, those changes have only accelerated over the last three years as more businesses have gone online. The government also has created laws and policies that disincentivize the most productive men, or the government creates mandates that encourage people to resign from the workforce. The government laws, regulations, and taxes made unintended consequences that affect both men and women who work a regular job or own a business.

Role Models and Mentors

Millennials and the younger generations have difficulty finding role models and mentors who will instruct them on being successful. Instead, they either join groups that negatively impact them, like gangs, play video games, or spend their time online rather than working on themselves. The loss and lack of role models and mentors have created a generation of weak men. Single men can look for a mentor to help them to better themselves. A mentor can hold men accountable to work to achieve their goals. Men can learn from their mentor’s experience and professional background to improve their professional lives. A mentor can help a single man navigate and find his life purpose.

Intersexual Dynamics

Women like to date and marry up, and this is called hypergamy. But when a society has feminized men, women don’t want to spend time with those men, and similarly, when women act like men, men don’t want to spend time with those women. The consequence is a lower birth rate. The demographics won’t meet the bare minimum required to keep society going for the next generation. When a society cannot reproduce at the necessary pace, it will collapse, or the demographic numbers will need to come in through immigration.

A Return to Positive Masculinity

Modern society has distorted what it means to be a man through the gynocentric social order. There shouldn’t be a need to put “positive” before masculinity. But here we are today. Rather than falling for what modern society tells men to do and that there is something wrong with being male, their men can return positive masculinity. Men can start to act rather than remain passive as modern society wants them to do.

Single men can begin to go after what they want in their life. Single men can focus on personal development, achieve their life goals, and work to produce in a society that wants everything given to people without doing work. Men have been doers in history and value them through creating and doing rather than just being. Single men can start to take personal responsibility and self-ownership of their lives. Personal responsibility and self-ownership go against the communitarian characteristics of the gynocentric social order.

Return to a Life of Action

Men have traditionally been about doing things and taking action in your life. Rather than staying stagnant and stuck, men can decide to take action to change their lives. For men to change their lives, it will require time and hard work. In a culture that looks down on taking responsibility, it is time for men to take control of their lives with radical self-responsibility and self-ownership. Stop listening and telling people or yourself to stay safe. Accept that risk is part of life and utilize calculated risk to help you in your own life. Self-discipline is freedom.

Conclusion

The myth of toxic masculinity is a growing problem in society. There is nothing wrong with being male. Single men don’t need to worry about what the gynocentric social order says about men. Single men can focus on themselves. Single men can invest in themselves and work towards their life goals. Single men can work to become the best versions of themselves and produce by working to provide for themselves and those who they care for in their life. The solution is to stop believing the toxic masculinity myth. Single men can embrace conventional masculinity and manhood. Single men can stop putting women and romantic relationships on a pedestal.

Views expressed in this article are the author’s opinions and do not necessarily reflect the views of Secure Single. It is intended for informational and educational purposes only. It is not investment or financial advice. James Bollen is the author of Thriving Solo: How to Flourish and Live Your Perfect Life (Without A Soulmate). Now available in paperback and for the Kindle on Amazon. Subscribe to Secure Single’s Substack for free!

Men are deciding to stay single or to go their own way. Men are doing this because men are not in a good position if a marriage does not work. The cost of getting divorced and for alimony is expensive. Men are going their own way because of the costs of divorce and alimony for men. Fewer people are getting married today, or they are choosing to delay getting married. Singles are a rising demographic in the United States in industrialized countries. People are staying single longer for many different reasons. Men are also giving up on women, marriage and are choosing to go their way. Single men are finding it more beneficial to opt-out of dating and eventually getting married. The additional financial risks of the costs of divorce and alimony disincentivize men from getting married. More and more single men are deciding to enjoy the single life and go their own way. These are three simple reasons why men are choosing to go their own way.

Costs of Divorce and Alimony Driving Men To Go Their Own Way

What is Men Going Their Own Way? Men Going Their Own Way focuses on sovereignty and rejecting society’s stereotypes of what it means to be a man. Men who are part of Men Going Their Own Way choose freedom above all else.

What Is Men Going Their Own Way?

According to Men Going Their Own Way’s (MGTOW) website, MGTOW is a:

statement of self-ownership, where the modern man preserves and protects his own sovereignty above all else. It is the manifestation of the word ‘No.’ Ejecting silly preconceptions and cultural definitions of what a ‘man’ is. Looking to no one else for social cues. Refusing to bow, serve and kneel for the opportunity to be treated like a disposable utility. And, living according to his own best interests in a world which would rather he didn’t.

Men Going Their Own Way is not a movement. It is made of individuals who have decided to make a lifestyle choice. The lifestyle choice is recognizing that they are a sovereign individual. Sovereignty is being able to self-govern yourself and free from external control. It is better to be sovereign than to always look for a romantic relationship.

Men Going Their Own Way emphasizes personal agency and that marriage takes away freedom. Romantic relationships, especially marriage, restrict and limit individuals’ choices since you have another person to consider. Life gets more complicated once you have children, which further takes away personal sovereignty. In essence, Men Going Their Own Way is about sovereignty above all else.

Views expressed in this article are the author’s opinions and do not necessarily reflect the views of Secure Single. It is intended for informational and educational purposes only. It is not investment or financial advice. James Bollen is the author of Thriving Solo: How to Flourish and Live Your Perfect Life (Without A Soulmate). Now available in paperback and for the Kindle on Amazon. Subscribe to Secure Single’s Substack for free!