What is antinatalism? There are different schools of thought within antinatalism, but each critiques procreation and the belief in the need to reproduce and have children. There are philosophical and social reasons why someone may adopt an anti-procreative worldview. Antinatalism presents a negative view of procreation. It is best to minimize world suffering; the only inevitable outcome is death.
What Is Antinatalism?
Antinatalism is a broad term for anti-procreation philosophy and school of thought. Antinatalism is a critique of human existence, has a negative view of procreation, and argues that bringing a new life into the world is harmful. The premise of antinatalism is that procreation is unethical because life is suffering. The outcome of all life is death. It is better not to bring a new life into the world because life is pain, and the child will eventually die anyway. It has been in history in other forms, from religion to philosophy. Dualist religions such as Marcionism, Encratism, and Manicheanism taught that procreation is evil because the visible world is evil, including the human body, while the spiritual world is good. The goal is to leave the physical body and world to attain a higher reality and become part of the spiritual world.
For this reason, people should not procreate because the body and physical world are evil. In philosophy, antinatalism follows negative ethics that view procreation as harmful. Humans non-consensually brought a new life into the world without the child’s consent. Certain philosophers also argue that procreation goes against the Kantian Imperative. A child cannot be brought into the world for the good of other people or the Earth. A child brings harm to the mother and Mother Earth.
In short, antinatalism presents death as harm. It is better not to get a new life into the world. It follows negative utilitarianism, which argues that minimizing suffering is more important than maximizing happiness.
EFILism
EFILism believes that since humans and animals result from unintelligent design, they experience unnecessary suffering. For that reason, it is best to stop procreating. The human race can go extinct. It places responsibility on the human race to stop breeding to stop the suffering of other sentient lives such as animals. EFILism sees humans and procreation as a problem because the real concerns are DNA, nature, and sentience on Earth.
Voluntary Human Extinction Movement
VHEMT is the Voluntary Human Extinction Movement. The goal of VHEMT is for the human race to go extinct to return the Earth to its pre-human state and return Earth’s environment to non-human animals.
Childfree
Childfree is a term that describes someone who has voluntarily decided not to have children. People may be childfree for five reasons: financial, job, and career goals, no desire to have children, personal health and well-being, and the environment. The childfree movement has grown and shows there is nothing wrong with being childfree.
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Conclusion
These are four different thoughts within antinatalism, but the different variations critique human procreation because human existence is suffering. Someone may be an antinatalist for various reasons, from not wanting to have children to preserving and protecting the environment.
Views expressed in this article are the author’s opinions and do not necessarily reflect the views of Secure Single. It is intended for informational and educational purposes only. It is not investment or financial advice. James Bollen is the author of Thriving Solo: How to Flourish and Live Your Perfect Life (Without A Soulmate). Now available in paperback and for the Kindle on Amazon. Subscribe to Secure Single’s Substack for free!
You may be wondering, do I have to have kids? Do I need to have children? What is childfree? Here is a look at what it means to be childfree.
What Is Childfree?
Childfree means that you have no kids. You can be single and childfree. A couple could also be married and childfree.
Why Would Someone Choose To Be Childfree?
It could be a lifestyle choice that singles or even couples choose. There are some single who may have no interest in dating or marriage. Those single may be single by choice or celibate.
A couple may agree that they do not want to have children. Or, a woman may be infertile and unable to have children.
Childfree As A Lifestyle Choice
Being childfree is a lifestyle choice. Here are five reasons why someone, or a couple, may decide to be childfree.
Environmental
There are environmental reasons why someone may decide to be childfree. They may be worried about bringing a new child into the world due to concerns about climate change. They may not want to have a child who will contribute to waste, which will negatively affect the planet. The Environmental Protection Agency found:
- Food waste was estimated at 63.1 million tons in 2018.
- Plastic products were estimated at 35.7 million tons in 2018.
- Municipal waste was estimated at 292.4 million tons.
If someone cares deeply about nature and wants to care for Mother Earth, they may decide to be childfree.
Costs Associated With Raising Children
The cost of living, education, transportation, food, and other expenses continue to become more expensive. Most Americans already live paycheck to paycheck. It is no secret that raising children is expensive.
Due to the financial costs of having children, someone may choose to be childfree to save or invest money so that they can live.
Noise Pollution
Children can be loud. Someone may decide to be childfree so they do not have to put up with the noise pollution from children.
May Not Want To Raise Children
Someone may have no interest in wanting to raise children. They may not view themselves as good with kids or the parenting type. A couple may decide to live together or be married but never want to have children.
May Be Infertile
A woman may be infertile. Or, a woman may be past childbearing age. Even if she wanted to have children, she may no longer be able to have children.
Individual Or A Couple’s Choice
It is ultimately up to everyone to make their own choices. Each person then is responsible for their decisions. A single or a couple may have their reasons for choosing to be childfree. People have the freedom to decide how they want to live their lives.
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Conclusion
These are only some reasons why people may choose to be childfree. It is up to each person to determine if they want to have children. Some single men and women may have no interest in having children or even getting married. Someone, or a couple, may do it for financial or personal reasons. Childfree, in essence, means simply just not having children.
Views expressed in this article are opinions of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of Secure Single. James Bollen is the author of Thriving Solo: How to Flourish and Live Your Perfect Life (Without A Soulmate). Now available in paperback on Amazon. Subscribe to Secure Single’s Substack for free!
Demographics of nations are changing, especially in industrialized countries. Those who are single, unmarried, and childless are becoming the new normal while marriage is becoming less common. Being single is often viewed as a problem as is being childless by people and society. On the contrary; there is nothing wrong with being single, unmarried, and childless. Those who are single and childless should not view themselves negatively since it is becoming the new trend. Being single and childless is not a problem and it is a lifestyle choice that is on the rise today.
Rise Of The Single And Childless In Society
Part of the West’s American Dream is to get married, get a white picket fence, and to have children. That part of the dream is declining as people are staying single longer and replacing children with pets. There are some people who view the decline of marriage and not having kids as a social problem that is prominent among Millennials that needs to be corrected. There is nothing wrong with people to choose not to get married and to decide that they don’t want to have children. However, those who believe that marriage is a necessity to having a good society often believe that children as necessary too. Those who hold this belief often regard marriage and family as the foundation of society. Children naturally follow from marriage and keep both the family and society going through having kids. This is not a popularly held belief today as society has become more secular and people are staying single longer and choosing not to marry.
There are some singles who may eventually want to get date and get married, but who do not want to have children. People who decide not to have children are stigmatized for not having children. This is a problem because there is nothing wrong for an individual, or a couple, to decide that they never want to have children. This stigma is misplaced because more people are deciding that they would rather have pets instead of children, childless women are on the rise, and there is now a childless movement. As people continue to stay longer, it is expected that people will delay having kids or choose not to have children. This is not a problem. People and society who think that is should stop stigmatizing those who are single and unmarried for their decision not to have children. Being single and childless is the new normal.
People are staying single and childless longer as a result of a number of factors. These factors include economic, financial, and social circumstances. Millennials are having a more difficult time finding jobs that pay enough to start to buy a house and are often working to pay off student loans. The economic conditions included the housing crash from 2006 to 2009 and the economy did not see any steady growth until recently. The combination of financial and economic influences have made it more difficult for Millennials to become financially stable for those single who want to get married and have children. However, while society still negatively stereotypes singles, being single is on the rise and is increasingly common countries. As a result of people staying single longer, the social norms have begun to change to make accommodate singles from housing to lifestyle choices.
Summary
There is nothing wrong with being single. There is nothing wrong with being childless. There is nothing wrong with being single and childless. There are many ways to enjoy life, whether single or married, and this is one in an array of options for how people can decide to live their life. Those who decide to be single and childless should not be stigmatized for their lifestyle choice by people and by society. It is time for society to completely accept those who are single and childless instead of continuing to hold them in contempt for their lifestyle choice.
Views expressed in this article are the author’s opinions and do not necessarily reflect the views of Secure Single. It is intended for informational and educational purposes only. It is not investment or financial advice. James Bollen is the author of Thriving Solo: How to Flourish and Live Your Perfect Life (Without A Soulmate). Now available in paperback and for the Kindle on Amazon. Subscribe to Secure Single’s Substack for free!
There are many people who are single who may want to date, but they do not date people who want to have kids. Many millennials are already faced with student loan debt and are working to pay it off while getting their careers on track. It’s distracting thinking about dating, and even about starting a family. We all want what we want, but we must first be willing to work hard for it. Some people were lucky to be born with a silver spoon in their hand, or to have had their college paid for by their parents. When you have both emotions and have student loans to pay of, you have got to work hard and can’t; deal with any distractions. Every minute matters. Here’s the breakdown in three steps:
Student Loans
They really suck. Trade schools are smart to get into because you can instantly go to work with real skills that are marketable to the world. When You get a general degree, making yourself marketable is tougher. Picking up a side hustle, getting into sales, and starting your own company are great ways to begin to pay off your student loans. You want to work to pay off all your loans and get into a financial position where you can breathe.College is expensive, and not really worth it. Ugh!
Career Focused
Yes, it’s true that millennials are the largest age demographic to be single, unwed, and childless, but it is also true that due to the student loan debt we have we are geared towards making a living and paying it all off. It’s time to be responsible. It’s time to get focused in our careers. Kids and marriage can come later in life, but in your 20’s you have so much energy to make things happen. What you do NOW will affect the rest of your future. You Have to be so careful how you spend your time, and you have to work towards generating GOOD cash flow to set up your future to be bright.
Be Free From Kids
Why bring children into the world when the divorce rate is at 50% and growing, and we live in a world where people are afraid of commitment. Relationships are messy. We need to set things up to counterbalance these events from happening. Use birth control and don’t get emotionally involved. People don’t commit, so why have children with them, especially out of wedlock? Be smart, and be safe.
In order to love better and have a more liberated life, you have got to work hard for what you want. It may require more hours but hey it’s your life and you need to find a way to make it worth something. Get out of debt, focus on your career, and don’t mess around with non-committal people because relationships are messy as it is. When You focus on you, and are bettering your life, you are truly living and being in alignment with your true self and making every second count. There is not a minute to lose, so focus on your goals, write them down, take steps towards them every day, and make what you do count. You can do it, and you are worth it to make your dreams and goals happen! Go get it!
Cheers,
Danielle
Views expressed in this article are the author’s opinions and do not necessarily reflect the views of Secure Single. It is intended for informational and educational purposes only. It is not investment or financial advice. James Bollen is the author of Thriving Solo: How to Flourish and Live Your Perfect Life (Without A Soulmate). Now available in paperback and for the Kindle on Amazon. Subscribe to Secure Single’s Substack for free!
Thanksgiving dinner is the first holiday dinner that singles will have to go to this holiday season where family, extended family, and friends will ask you questions that are on all of their minds. Why are you still single? When was your last relationship? Why are you not dating anyone? When are you going to have children? While people are single for different reasons, there is nothing wrong with being single. This is a conversation recipe for how to respond to your family and friends interrogating questions about why you have no significant other.
Why Are You Still Single?
Directions: You are single because you found that the single life has much more to offer compared to when you were dating x, y, or z. In fact, you don’t see why it is a problem. Why are you asking me why I am single, you are not asking them why they aren’t divorced yet or how their marriage is going?
Recipe Variations: You are taking a break from relationships right now. You are content being single and have found that it better than dating. Or, you are single by choice and are not interested in ever getting into a relationship. You respect their choice to stay married, get divorced, live with their partner, etc; why can’t they respect your choice to remain single?
When Was Your Last Relationship?
Directions: Insert the number of years since your last relationship, now describe the values of the single life and how you have found them to benefit you while being in a relationship constrained you from achieving your potential. You can also say how you enjoy being single and you don’t know when your next relationship will be, you may be on a break, or that you have no interest in dating anyone.
Recipe Variations: You can point out that singles are on the rise, millennials are delaying marriage, and relationships can be overrated.
Why Are You Not Dating Anyone?
Directions: Describe that the need to date and to become a serial dater is a repercussion of society’s dating industrial complex. There is no need for people to date to be in romantic relationships when friendships can actually be more worthwhile. The need to always date has driven people into a relationship hysteria and to not recognize that the single life is worth living. You are enjoying your time being single and being able to focus on developing yourself instead of having to take care of someone else.
Recipe Variations: Pick the dangers of dating and online dating, especially in light of all the recent sexual assault and abuse scandals. Consider adding a generous dash of sass, spice, or sarcasm about the dating industry and people always being in relationships as you want.
When Are You Going to Have Children?
Directions: You can say that you have never asked about their sex lives and whether or not they planned to have their children or if they are considering having more. How is this an appropriate question?
Recipe Variations: This is one of the more direct and uncomfortable questions to be asked, you are welcome to retaliate to the question as you think is best. The response range can range from a jalapeno to ghost pepper, dependent upon the context and tone of the person who asked it. There is nothing wrong with being childless. It is fine to be single and childless.
These are four short and easy conversation recipes to guide you through those awkward questions that family and friends love to ask singles at Thanksgiving. Please use a generous dash of the ingredients and spices of your choice when responding to each question as the circumstances require. Turn up the heat and watch these questions burn in flames.
Views expressed in this article are the author’s opinions and do not necessarily reflect the views of Secure Single. It is intended for informational and educational purposes only. It is not investment or financial advice. James Bollen is the author of Thriving Solo: How to Flourish and Live Your Perfect Life (Without A Soulmate). Now available in paperback and for the Kindle on Amazon. Subscribe to Secure Single’s Substack for free!
There is a new movement that is in its infancy. It is the Childless Movement. There are many different types of people that could fit within this movement, but its focus is on the involuntarily childless. Those who are single and childless by choice should look into this movement and help it to gain momentum. Here is a look at the rise of the childless movement.
The Rise Of The Childless Movement
There are people who have chosen that they do not want to have children by sexual relations, adoption, or in vitro fertilization. They are single by choice. They are childless by choice. This childless movement can join those who are single by choice and childless by choice. In industrialized countries, where singles are a rising demographic, singles can join the movement by speaking out against society and popular culture’s pressure for singles to get married and have children. After all, there is nothing wrong with being single or childless.
Women who want to work to progress the fourth-wave of feminism to incorporate childlessness should act to ally these two movements. Feminism and the childless movement can work together to achieve shared goals. The childless movement is a perfect opportunity for women to express themselves and let their voices be heard. Women, especially single women, can give themselves a voice that it should not be a social obligation to marry and have children. Women do not need a husband. Women are fine single. Women can pursue a career and enjoy life child free. Those are main components of the childless movement that women should choose to embrace. It gives them independence to live their life how they wish without being restrained by the goal finding and having a husband, two-and-a-half kids, and a white picket fence. Being single and childless gives women freedom.
Freedom is the foundation of the single life. Singles are able to choose how to live life according to their own terms. Being childless gives independence since children are expensive, require time, and to be with them as they grow up. Singles can embrace permanent self-governance by making the decision to be single by choice. For singles who are single by choice, the childless movement aligns with the values of the single life. Singles and the childless can join together to propel what being single truly means in a society that worships the white picket fence. The white picket fence can be changed making it acceptable to being childless and single.
Summary
The childless movement should work to unite the power of the growing number of singles in countries. Singles who are single by choice can join to give more strength to the movement. It is time that singles and childless are respected by society. The childless movement is a necessary first step along with singles studies to change the perception of being single by society.
Views expressed in this article are the author’s opinions and do not necessarily reflect the views of Secure Single. It is intended for informational and educational purposes only. It is not investment or financial advice. James Bollen is the author of Thriving Solo: How to Flourish and Live Your Perfect Life (Without A Soulmate). Now available in paperback and for the Kindle on Amazon. Subscribe to Secure Single’s Substack for free!
The topic of having children has been a long debated discussion for singles, and married couples. The people surveyed in most studies are people who have had children, are considering children, or do not have children at all are considered, even young people. People involved are single parents, unmarried singles, and married couples. Single adults who may be career oriented are also included in in the pool study.
Single, Childless, And Happy
The debate on having children, or not, can result in 1 of 4 outcomes:
- No Children and Happy
- No Children and Unhappy
- Children and Happy
- Children and Unhappy
There are many factors that can affect the experience each person has, which includes the financial situation of the parent, the general happiness level of the person excluding their parental status, and what type of cultural environment the person lives in. You could call it the good old, ‘nature vs. nurture’ comparison.
The two most common outcomes that we will focus on for today is people with or without children and their happiness levels.
The Pros
Some parents say that having children gives meaning to their lives, which is quite a fulfilling life goal for some. Some people are just wired differently, and are natural caregivers. This is not a bad characteristic. From a child’s perspective, having a parent who truly loves you and cares for your upbringing is a huge indicator of an emotionally stable and confident adult life.
You may call this perspective ‘Heart Work’. When money is not a factor, and neither is outside stress. This can be a good thing if you are prepared for it.
The Cons
It’s no secret that children are expensive. An article in the Washington Post reveals that families shell out an average of $13,000 a year, or appropriately $233,610 over the course of raising a child to age 17. Deciding not to have children can free up your finances, and can allow you more freedom to travel, invest, and get more educated.
Children are stressful, and cause parents a lot of anxiety during the initial child rearing stages. Not having children allows you the time and space to be more relaxed, and focus on having a better and higher quality life.
Another take is that people who are married experience a lot of change after a baby arrives. What is shocking is that parents are more likely to be depressed than their child-free counterparts, and that people without kids were happier than any other group, including empty nesters, according to a study conducted by the American Sociological Association.
Whether single or partnered up, your sex life also diminishes after having children. According to Psychology Today, parents don’t have enough energy for sex, they allow their children to sleep in the same bedroom, and planning for date night requires a lot of effort to schedule babysitters. In fact, having safe sex is really important for your overall health.
The overall quality of single life or married life declines as a result from time allocated into child rearing. This would be a definite indicator that having children decrease your happiness levels without a doubt.
Either way you look into it, people tend to do what makes them happy. Whether it may be a single adult who is rocking their career and loving it, or parents who feel more fulfilled after having children, one should look into what the pro’s and cons are for each side. Find out what makes you happy, and do more of it! As for now, rock what you’ve got, and have fun doing it.
Views expressed in this article are the author’s opinions and do not necessarily reflect the views of Secure Single. It is intended for informational and educational purposes only. It is not investment or financial advice. James Bollen is the author of Thriving Solo: How to Flourish and Live Your Perfect Life (Without A Soulmate). Now available in paperback and for the Kindle on Amazon. Subscribe to Secure Single’s Substack for free!
The topic of having children has been a long debated discussion for singles, and married couples. First, understanding that the people surveyed in most studies are people who have had children, are considering children, or do not have children at all. People involved are single parents with or without children, and married couples with or without children.
The debate on having children, or not, can result in 1 of 4 outcomes
- No Children and Happy
- No Children and Unhappy
- Children and Happy
- Children and Unhappy
There are many factors that can affect the experience each person has, which includes the financial situation of the parent, the general happiness level of the person excluding their parental status, and what type of cultural environment the person lives in. You could call it the good old, ‘nature vs. nurture’ comparison.
The two most common outcomes that we will focus on for today is people with or without children and their happiness levels.
The Pros
It’s no secret that children are expensive. An article in the Washington Post reveals that families shell out an average of $13,000 a year, or appropriately $233,610 over the course of raising a child to age 17. Deciding not to have children can free up your finances, and can allow you more freedom to travel, invest, and get more educated.
Children are stressful and cause parents a lot of anxiety during the initial child rearing stages. Not having children allows you the time and space to be more relaxed, and focus on having a better and higher quality life.
Singles with no children have more freedom, and time. Two qualities that attribute to higher levels of happiness. And then there are some singles who simply do not have a desire to bear and rear children. This does not make them selfish. It is simply their personal choice. And it is a legitimate decision.
The Cons
People who are married experience a lot of change after a baby arrives. What is shocking is that parents are more likely to be depressed than their child-free counterparts and that people without kids were happier than any other group, including empty nesters, according to a study conducted by the American Sociological Association.
Whether single or partnered up, your sex life also diminishes after having children. According to Psychology Today, parents don’t have enough energy for sex, they allow their children to sleep in the same bedroom, and planning for date night requires a lot of effort to schedule babysitters. In fact, having safe sex is really important for your overall health.
The overall single life or marriage quality declines as a result from time allocated into child rearing. Boo.
Cultural Influences
Depending on where you live, and the influences you have around you, you may be pressured to have children or stay career oriented and single. Generally, as noted in All The Single Ladies by Rebecca Traister, women who live in cities tend to work more and have more social freedoms than their rural counterparts. The cultural effect has a big play on your parental status and happiness status.
Either way you look into it, people tend to do what makes them happy. Whether it may be a single adult who is rocking their career and loving it, or parents who feel more fulfilled after having children, one should look into what the pros and cons are for each side. Find out what makes you happy, and do more of it! As for now, rock what you’ve got, and have fun doing it.
Cheers,
Danielle